Today we've got two great front page stories on how jacked up our traditional media has become. From Outfoxed to Glenn Greenwald's astounding use of Lexis-Nexis (11th grader-level research, without an endowment from the John D. and Catherine T. MacArthur foundation even!), we've seen the establishment tout some basic memes with no basis in reality.
One of these memes has, of course, surfaced in our recent spin cycle. It's the myth of McSaint, McBush, McW, Mc-Hundred-Years-of-War. Senator Bomb Bomb. Now, we can all have a rousing good laugh at the fact that John Mc-Murderous-as-Cain-when-he-killed-Abel is treated with kid gloves, even though the Senator-from-Arizona-to-the-gates-of-hell used to be called "McNasty" in high school. I mean, it was 1954, cut him a break. That was a loooong time ago, and you know he's sensitive about his age. He's just... sensitive, that's all. Like he's sensitive to the needs of working-class white uh, blue state uh, collar, Reagan Democrats in central Pennsylvania. But you just won't listen, you trollop. You know your problem, you're just bitter.
John "The Baptist" McConversion, an alumnus of Episcopal High School, thinks you aren't bitter. He'll do anything-- say anything-- he can think of to keep you happy. He was against the tax cuts, see? But that didn't work, so then he was for them. He called the religious demagogues "agents of intolerance." But he just wants everyone to be happy, so he spoke at Liberty University. See, John McHagee doesn't think you cling to religious intolerance because you're bitter. He's personally tried to make you happy, you see, by taking every position on the political map.
That's because John McBKSH is a family man. No, not a man who's loyal to his tragically-injured first wife, or particularly kind to his current wife, Cindy Anheuser-McBucsh. Although there's something to be said for a man so loyal to his mistress that he marries her! No, John McConfidence-on-ethics-poses-its-own-risks is loyal to the Burson-Marsteller family of companies. He's extraordinarily loyal to the lobbyists who run his Presidential campaigns, and amazingly able to work with them in the Senate at the same time! If John McCommerce-Committee says one thing to you in a smoky back room, you can be sure he'll say the same thing when your bill comes before his committee. You'll never hear about John McColombia-free-trade-deal taking position contrary to the lobbyists who run his campaign--because he agreeswith them completely! John McKickback recognizes that untidy dissent between federal lobbyists and their clients is a bipartisan problem, and he wants to seek bipartisan solutions. After all, family values begin at home. Speaking of bipartisanship, John McPenn-Schoen-Berland's chief political strategist Charlie Black, is a longtime employee of the same Burson-Marsteller family of companies that had, until recently, advised his political opponent! Talk about family values-- it's downright incestuous!
You should be glad John McAccess opens his home to the press, to make all his long, consistent record public. John McKeating-five may say he'll never make a mistake again, but actions speak louder than words. And pictures are worth a thousand of them. The picture of Johnny McCaught-in-the-act in this article is worth much, much more than all the non-equivocating, non-pretzel-logic-titled articles the traditional media could ever write about John McCorruption. And if you don't believe John McCracks-jokes-at-our-soldiers-expense really loves you, he'll prove it with gifts. Here, he brought you a shiny new IED.
So John McMaverick-means-never-having-to-say-you're-sorry is willing to talk straight talk with the American people, and doesn't think they're bitter. He'll get everyone a seat on the Straight Talk Express, which conveniently skips all the stops where things make sense. Here's some straight talk: there's gonna be other wars! Like it? How about this: when he says g#$%ks, he just means the ones who tortured him! He hates them!Hate hate hate hate hate. He'd probably torture them himself, if he could. He didn't back down and prove that corrupt regimes only practice torture to elicit false confessions-- why, his daddy and grandpappy were Admirals! John McCan't-tell-the-difference-between-Al-Qaeda-and-Iran just does what he knows. He knows torture. And he certainly wouldn't turn his back on his heritage. Like his confederate heritage. Confederate flag? He was pandering!Just trying to cover up his black baby, to make sure George W. Bush didn't get bitter! It worked, too. And later, they even hugged. Awww. Remember that? Straight talk! Maverick! A kind of horse!
You have no reason to be bitter.
Maybe a hundred.
Certainly not an obscure sect of the Shiites, or the Sunnis, or anybody?
Like a trollop, you c%$#.
Bomb Bomb Bomb, Bomb Bomb Iran.
Bomb Bomb Bomb, Bomb Bomb Iran.
Bomb Bomb Bomb, Bomb Bomb Iran.
Bomb Bomb Bomb, Bomb Bomb Iran.