-- with Apologies to Thomas Jefferson and the Second Continental Congress.
When in the Course of human events it becomes necessary for the people to dissolve the political stranglehold of lobbyists and special interests which have confounded them and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of the political establishment, the blogosphere and interested pundits requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to take such action.
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all voters are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, the pursuit of Happiness and the Right to not have to listen to Wolf Blitzer, Pat Buchanan, Sean Hannity, corporate controlled media or any others deluded due to living in the beltway bubble or because they conform to out of date political philosophies. — That to secure these rights, Campaigns are instituted among the People, determining their Candidate and deriving their just powers from the consent of the grassroots, — That whenever any Form of Campaign becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new political organizations, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness.
Prudence, indeed, will dictate that political entities long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. How else did we end up electing George W. Bush twice??????
But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Politics, and to provide new Guards for their future security. — Such has been the patient sufferance of these Democratic Primary Voters; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Nomination.
The history of the present King and Queen of Clintonia is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over the Democratic Party and the Electoral College. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.
She has refused his Assent to Laws, especially campaign finance laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good.
She has forbidden her Superdelegates to ratify the nomination of Barack Obama unless suspended in their operation till her Assent should be obtained; and when so suspended, she has utterly neglected to attend to them even though she cannot overcome the pledged delegate deficit and any other candidate would have dropped out a long time ago.
She has refused to pass other Laws for the accommodation of large districts of people, unless those people would be represented by Lobbyists and Special Interests in the Legislature, a right unavailable to most regular people and of use to tyrants only.
She has called together meetings at places unusual, uncomfortable, and distant for the sole purpose of making deals away from notice of the people, such as her rural policy summit that was held in the Washington DC offices of Monsanto’s lobbying firm.
She has dissolved the Democratic Party in states that don’t matter to her, for opposing with firmness her campaign and its insults against the rights of the people.
She has obstructed the Administration of Justice by refusing her Assent to Laws for not using FBI files for inappropriate reasons and firing the White House Travel Office with no just cause.
She has abdicated leadership of her own campaign for President, by declaring Mark Penn as both pollster and strategist, not being aware of financial mismanagement and, as a result, having to loan her own campaign $5 million even though campaign manager Patti Solis Doyle was not aware of the loan.
She has plundered our caucuses, ravaged our yard signs, burnt our rally signs, and destroyed the buttons and campaign literature handed out by our people.
She has constrained our fellow Citizens taken Captive at her rallies and forced into smaller venues to give the appearance of throngs of supporters.
She has excited domestic insurrections amongst us, has let loose the wagging finger and red Face of her Husband and has endeavoured to bring on the slice and dice politics of Karl Rove and the Republican Attack Machine, ™ the merciless Swiftboating Savages whose known rule of political warfare is an undistinguished destruction of all ages, sexes and conditions if they are deemed to be unacceptably liberal.
In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Clinton, whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people and/or the Democratic Party, especially after Keith Olbermann called her out on all of this during a Special Comment!
Nor have We been wanting in attentions to our Clinton brethren and sistren. We have warned them from time to time of attempts by their campaign to extend an unwarrantable jurisdiction over us. We have reminded them of the circumstances of our emigration and settlement here. We have appealed to their native justice and magnanimity, and we have conjured them by the ties of our common kindred to disavow these usurpations, which would inevitably interrupt our connections and correspondence. They too have been deaf to the voice of justice and of consanguinity. We must, therefore, acquiesce in the necessity, which denounces our Separation, and hold them, as we hold the rest of the political parties, Enemies in the Primary, in Peace in the General Election because John McCain is running for a third Bush term.
We, therefore, the Representatives of Obama for America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Obama Blogs, Groups, ListServs and Websites, solemnly publish and declare, That these united Obama Supporters are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent Voters, that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the Clinton Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Clintonia, is and ought to be totally dissolved until Hillary concedes the nomination; and that as Free and Independent Voters, they have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace, contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent Voters may of right do to support their chosen candidate. — And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of Divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Votes, a good deal of our online and real life Lives, our Campaign Contributions of time and/or money commensurate with our commitment level to the campaign, and our sacred Honor.