Who is the man known as the Goracle?
Who is the man who won a Nobel Prize, an Emmy, an Oscar, and the Tennessee Amateur Bowling League Team Championship in the same year? Al Gore, of course.
Who's the man who won't cop out, when there's danger all about?
Al Gore, that's who.
No, I won't hush my mouth, I'm just talking about Al Gore!
So why hasn't Al Gore endorsed? What is he waiting for? Why won't he put an end to all this dreariness in favor of the candidate of your choice?
The answer is simple, Fellow Democrats. You are not worthy!
Al Gore is watching you, be sure of that. He is watching over all of you, even as he watches over the planet.
Occasionally sparrows do fall without his knowing of it, but when it comes to Democrats, he sees all, knows all.
He weeps when you criticize your fellow Democrats, did you know that?
He actually weeps when that happens. It disappoints him. When you fail to train your sights on John McCain, he is vexed. When the candidate you don't support makes a gaffe, or tells a lie, go ahead, jump on it and blast them. But be aware that he is watching. And know that each invitation to attack your Fellow Democrat is not an opportunity, but a test. A test that Al Gore hopes you will pass.
When you fail that test, he is vexed. When you suggest starving the DCCCC to punish them for being threatened by other donors, he is vexed. These are the things that incur his wrath.
When you forget about the Supreme Court, or what is at stake in November, just as when you forget to turn off your lights, this also makes him wroth.
Let it be known that he is also vexed by divisive comments on blogs, in particular, and concern trolling on blogs also, and hiding comments you do not agree with, or uprating personal attacks and sexist or racial slurs is an abomination unto him.
Al Gore will not smite you for these transgressions, for that is not his way. He is merely disappointed in you, and sad because you are cheating your own self. Always, he hopes that you will do better.
Al Gore will never TR you, or refuse to vote for your candidate unless some other is nominated, for this also is not his way.
He is loving and accepting, and stands ready to welcome you back into the fold with his strong arms when you have repented.
Al Gore wants you to love one another, and raise money for your down ticket candidates without disunion and anger.
He is there, watching you, rooting for you, knowing that although you can never be Al Gore, you can still be better than you have been. He knows that your hope can triumph over your anger, that when you are united, you are indestructible.
And most of all, for the sake of the country and the planet we all share, Al Gore is counting on you.
Let me tell you a story about Al Gore:
Carbon Footprints:
Once I went on a long journey with Al Gore. I think it was during the 1992 primary. When we reached the end of the long and difficult trip, I looked back at our footprints and noticed that there were times when there was only a single set of footprints.
I said to him, "Al Gore, you promised that you would walk this lonesome journey with me, but when I look back, sometimes there is only one set of footprints, what's up with that?"
He replied, "Those are Carbon Footprints, my son, and sometimes yours were so huge that they covered mine up. Also some of the other times I stopped to go the bathroom. Still other times I walked inside your footprints in order to fool anybody that might have been following us."
You can imagine how stupid I felt when he said that. So don't let that happen to you, is all I want to say in this diary. Go, and sin no more.
