There is a theme to each month out of the year. February is Black history month, March is women's history month, and then there is April. Most of the theme months have great posters and cute "did you know" factoids on the news and in the paper each day. We learn about great men and women of all colors and backgrounds, but what do we learn in April? I am sure April is dedicated to a lot of worthy causes. April is Alcohol Awareness month, poetry month, and home of our annual celebration of Earth Day... Yet, there is something else that calls the month of April home.
The month of April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month or "SAAM"
I have used RAINN's (Rape, Abuse & Incest Network) website because I have found it to be a very easy and reliable reference. RAINN WEBSITE
My sophomore year of college started like any other year. I moved back into my dorm room, shelled out money for books, and began figuring out when I could fit work study into my class schedule. I also began to think that I wasn't giving enough of myself to my community. I needed a cause to rally behind, something that I could put my heart and soul into. I wanted to work on something that wasn't popular or in the spotlight.
On my way back to my dorm room after class, I read an ad posted on the information bulletin board. It said...
Wanted: Volunteer Rape Crisis Counselors wanted. Must attend 40hr workshop and pass certification for the State of California.
It was as if God was somehow leading me to where s/he to go. At the first meeting, there were six of us, eager and excited to take on the world in order to help bring justice to rape and sexual assault victims. We entered the training with childlike enthusiasm about helping others and practicing our second and third waves feminist beliefs.
Our woeful ignorance was a slap in the face to the cause and within a week, the six volunteers whittled down to three.
Each evening we poured over text on child abuse, statistics, police interrogation methods, and the evils of the justice system.
We learned how many children end up in the hospital, and that it is often the perpetrator who takes them to get help.
We learned that in our justice system, sentencing for rape and sexual assault was a walk in the park compared to convictions for drug possession or robbery.
We learned that there are victims who due to their mental health problems, are turned away by the police because the case would be too difficult and expensive to prosecute.
At the end of the course, there were only three of us left. We took the test and all passed it with flying colors. We signed up for shifts on the crisis line, and within weeks were off on our respective paths, only to meet once a month to swap "war" stories......
In the end.. no one knows..
No one knows that there are thousands of survivors of rape and sexual assault who live in the shadows due to the shame they feel at "just asking for it"
No one really wants to know that their child is more likely to be hurt by someone they know in their own environment, rather than being snatched on the streets.
No one really wants to acknowledge that even if a survivor is under the influence of alcohol, that he or she still doesn't deserve to be violated.
No one really believes that a husband can rape his wife and vice versa. I have sat in a senior level Politics course and one of my colleagues told me that they were married so s/he had a right to do it.
No one cares that a rape case is mainly built on character assassination, where the perpetrator brings out old boyfriends to testify that she has had sex many a time, why would the word "no" make a difference this time?
At the end of this diary, you will know.
You will know that in the state of California, police officials or the hospital must call a Rape Crisis Advocate to assist survivors through evidence gathering and forensic exams (it is very invasive, I let my clients decide if they want to go through with it), police interrogation, and counseling.
You will know that there is a 24hr crisis line available to call if you or a loved one needs to speak with someone.
You will know that many of the myths about sexual assault & rape (I have only included a few) are false.
5 Myths About Sexual Assault & Rape
- Rape is a crime of sexual passion and intimacy : The television is filled with Lifetime movies of women resisting a man, and then suddenly giving into the pleasure of sex. It is not a pleasurable experience, nor is it a crime of love and passion. Rape is about power. It is about asserting one's own power and dominance over another human being. Rapist do not choose their victims because they are sexually attractive or they feel some type of love for them. Rapist plan their attacks carefully, from the victim to the location; a rapist leaves no details to chance.
- Stranger rape is common: No. Sorry. According to (Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network) RAIIN, 73% of rape victims know their assailant.
- Men can not experience rape: Nope. Wrong again. Men can experience rape, and are the least likely to report to the police. This is highly relevant to men in the gay community, who often experience rape by a partner or acquaintance and feel that they will lose their masculinity by reporting or admitting rape.
- Sexual Assault/Rape is Rare : Another sad myth. According to RAINN, 1 out of every 6 women will be a victim of sexual assault in their lifetime.
- Rape is reported and caught with CSI DNA slam dunks: Nope, wrong again. 15 out of 16 rapists walk free. Go to Rainn's website and take a look at their reporting rates, 60% of rapes are not reported. Because the chance of arrest and prosecution are slim, many survivors choose not to report to the police.
Look for my diary next week, I'll discuss the following subject:
Children & Sexual Assault: How to Protect & Educate Your Child.
Thanks for reading, I hope I have shared something with you that you had not known before about Rape or Sexual Assault. If you have questions, please let me know. I am happy to speak to all of you about my experiences on the crisis line.
References:
RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest Network)