Dear Mister President,
Thank you for attacking Barack Obama. Although he is a weak, appeasing liberal and possibly of terrorist descent, he is also a cunning and ruthless adversary of good, old-fashioned, red-blooded American conservatives like John McCain. However, I am sure you understand that Johnny-boy (That's what you call him at Republican barbecues, right? Seriously, do you guys ever barbecue pork or chicken?) can't take on this threat alone.
The answer is no, he cannot. He is am old soldier, and before he fades away, he needs support from his Commander-in Chief. So, Mr. Bush, I ask you as a true patriot that believes in the American Flag absolutely and wholeheartedly, please keep up your attacks on this terrorist sympathizer, and remember to stand by John McCain at all times. Get in to the fight one more time.
Very truly yours,
Two Ajpuu