The new line of attack and criticism being leveled at Obama these days is that he is going to raise your taxes. Yes, you. Whether you make twenty grand or twenty million, it's time to bend over that barrel and let Uncle Sam have his way cause hoo-boy, Obama the tax and spend lib'ral is going to milk us dry (yes, that was a deliberately mixed metaphor). However, these criticisms are off base for two reasons:
- Obama's tax plan will raise taxes only on those making over $150,000, and that taxes will actually go down for families making less than $100,000.
- Obama has clearly stated time and again that he wishes to raise TEXAS, not taxes.
Apparently, the entire state of Texas was built hastily and without the requisite drainage, gas, and sewage features. If you have ever been to Texas, you know that pipes and ditches sit above ground on the sidewalks, like a city from the future gone wrong - all hissing steel tubes and the smelly aroma of human waste. Consequently, for the state to finally reach code, Obama has proposed the raising of the entire state of Texas by approximately two feet to adequately address the necessary civil engineering improvements that will be necessary to avoid future planning and development problems.
Additionally, a raised Texas will no longer be as susceptible to flooding from hurricanes from the Gulf of Mexico, or the cresting of rivers such as the Guadalupe which has caused problems in the past.
The cost of raising Texas has been estimated at over four kajillion dollars. How Obama plans on paying for the raising has yet to be addressed, though many economists have stated flatly that the only way such a project could be undertaken is through the raising of taxes.
In sum, it is imperative to get the word out that Barack Obama will NOT raise taxes of any kind (not even capital gains taxes) on middle class American families. HOWEVER, far more important and more relevant to our country is Obama's secret and nefarious (though ultimately quite sensible) plan to raise TEXAS.
Please spread the word.