You don't normally think of the public library as a hangout for knuckle-dragging buffoons, and yet I did encounter just such a critter this weekend and instead of going along with my usual polite introverted deference, I smacked him (rhetorically) upside his head. I can hardly believe it was me doing this.
While, standing in the audiobook section of our small-town library looking for something to entertain me during the morning and evening commutes, a rather large gentleman rounded the corner and stood next to me and began looking at the political books. I said nothing to him and simply kept skimming through the titles. He then pointed at a grouping of audiobooks that by chance included Al Franken, a few favorable books about the Clintons, and something unfavorable about Nixon. "They should call this the communist section," he said to me.
A statement such as that is so stupid in so many ways that there's no point in even sketching a rough diagram of the errors. And a person who would utter such nonsense, isn't going to follow the logic anyway. Normally, I reply with something vague and noncommittal like, "Well, there you go." And then hope the smug jackass wanders away. But this time my anger outraced my restraint.
I ignored any attempt at defense of Democrats and chose to attack instead. "You know, Bush and the Republicans are letting the Russians take over our space program," I said. And yes, I overstated the situation, and yes, Russia is no longer run by communists. But do you think he knew that?
"NASA is retiring the space shuttle in a couple of years, and they don't have a replacement for it. Bush and the Republicans have nickled and dimed any kind of funding for this and so now we have absolutely nothing on the production line to take its place.
"So their plan is to hitch to rides on the Russian flights. That means if we want to send anybody into space, we have to get permission from the Russians. And that's just fine with Bush and his Republican friends."
The gentleman frowned and then said something about Bill Clinton being the real communist. And then he walked off. I took that to mean that I had won.
Bonus video: here's a video of the latest development in the Orion Program, a possible successor to the shuttle. Gotta love the implimentation of that cutting-edge technology known as the parachute.