Tweety
Gloria Berger: Foreign Policy, Obama won that but so what? What is he going to do domestically, huh? Yeah, he hasn’t figured that out yet. I’m not going to give him that yet. By the way, McCain BBQ is still real good, you know.
The great Eugene Robinson: (Nothing satire about this brilliant man. He does everyone well in the journalism community. Bob Herbert has tried his best to catch up in the last week or so, and Frank Rich is consistently sharp. But Robinson is the best. By a decent margin.)
Elisabeth Bumiller: Obama can’t bring that much change when he gets to the White House because of those Republicans will try to gridlock everything at their most desperate attempt. I can’t see any other way. And he’s going to make those Daily Kos people pissed. Too bad, reality of politics
Joe Klein: Listen Gloria and Elisabeth, wake up! The times are changing and I see the light!
"The Republicans could be as freaked out in 2009 as the Democrats were in 1981."
(Keep it up Joe)
Meet the Press
Tom Brokaw : I’m just going to play the "middle man" and be "fair and balanced". That is what makes me Tom Brokaw, and I hope you all have realized this now after all these years of not doing o.
John Kerry: Joe, you are a liar and will I call you a liar and you know damn well that when I say you are a liar, well, you are an utter liar. You are a shame and if I could, I would spit on you. You just don’t care, you really don’t.
Joe Lieberman: Yeah, I know I don’t care, and that’s why I don’t care. And you know what, I’m going to come to my convention and support McCain as still more revenge for what happened in 2006. And I love those ad’s so much, they made the Swift boaters on you look like toy boats. Yes, I can laugh in these poor times for our country because I only care about me, me, me, Joe. Oh, and this
"Obama is a gifted young man."
(what a sellout)
Andrea Mitchell: I’ve seen the light. Obama is my way to the Meet the Press ticket. Whether he wins or losses. Oh, and I’m going to spread VP gossip and look cute doing it.
Mike Murphy: These ads from McCain aren’t going to damage him, even if it is so stupid (though if I was on the campaign team still, I would not say that it is stupid). But you know why I don’t think it will hurt him? Because I’m a Republican strategist, the best spin artists on the planet.
Chuck Todd: The McCain campaign may have found a right strategy. McCain is either Obama’s father...............or son. What the hell did I just say?
Judy Woodruff: Hillary is going to wave the Obama pompons. Bill may wave the Obama pompons after having a Dave Chapelle like trip to Africa. Obama’s not going to put Clinton the ticket. Obama is either going to pick a VP from Washington or not. That info is for anyone that hasn’t been paying any attention at all to what happen since the Democratic primary.
This Weak
George Stephanopoulos: Yield to me Nancy on this. You’re going to crack, and I’m going to make you crack. Drill, drill, drill, drill, drill, drill, drill!!! What do you have to say to that?????????????????
Nancy Pelosi: My response George to your constant annoying questioning as usual? Chill, chill, chill, chill, chill, chill, chill!
"To single shoot on something that won’t work and and mislead the American people into thinking its going to reduce the price of the pump, I’m not just going to be party to it."
And Jason Admire doesn’t speak for a lot of Democrats.
Tom Ridge: Damnit, George. I already know that because I’m pro-choice, I won’t be Johny’s running mate. But I can give my best attempt at being one. Obama is a liar, those ad’s were great and exposed Obama’s celebrity. And....................... drill, drill, drill, drill, drill, drill, drill, drill, drill. And I’m really boring.
David Gergen:
(But....)
Obama still needs to bring Hillary. It’s that simple. And I have that for about three months. Because I can boring too. Very Boring
George Will: Did you see my great piece of writing about Obama being so rhetorically nothing, huh? And yes, I’m inclined to believe the rhetorical genius of John McCain. Did you see those ads, brilliant!
Donna Brazile:
"If you want an ad that calls him as a hot celebrity, why not use Denzel Washington or Bono. Instead of someone that’s you know, hot."
Jake Zapper:
"The John McCain of 2000 would not have run this campaign in 2000. But John McCain lost in 2000."
(No Jake Zapper you tool, John McCain lost in 2000 honorably. John McCain in 2008 will lose embarrassingly, horribly, and painfully. )
Face the Nation: The High Demand and Overpriced Supply Economic Edition
Bob Schieffer: If Fiorna talks and says a lie, I’m just going to let her talk on. If Rubin is explaining Obama’s moves or "change of moves", I’ll interrupt. It’s why I still have the CBS chair. I am "fair and balanced." And oh, I blame Obama too for this negative campaign, and you know why? Because that is what we do, especially if you have such tenure like me.
Carlie Fiordor: I’m a liar, I’ll admit. And do you see me talking about my tenure at HP, nope. But I do say this: You don’t want to get tax, I don’t want to get taxed. That’s the most important thing to me. And not being asked about birth control, because I wouldn’t be able to lie as good as I do. Oh, and drill, drill, drill, drill, drill, drill, drill, drill!
Robert Rubin: Takes this fool. If we don’t tax the rich, how are we going to change this sorry economy. And Bob, stop being a McCain stenographer.
David "Applebee’s Salad Bar Eating" Brooks: I love McCain’s ads and he is fighting for us finally! This campaign is no doubt about Obama. He is arugula-eating uppity elitist. Surly, I’m not. I love spreading gossip rumors about Obama. Like how he isn’t part of the Trinity when he was.
Faux News Propaganda-day (The Worst Show on Television, outside of the others on Faux)
Chris Wallace: Obama isn’t tough enough. So much so that I will continue to use the distortion that Dana Milbank used so well this week. Even after it has been corrected 80 million times that he didn’t say those exact words like that, so what? I’m still pissed that I didn’t get an invitation overseas.
Lindsay Graham: I’m the biggest McCain ass licker yet and Lieberman isn’t on my level, and I can’t stand that uppity fool Obama. I can’t stand that......... uppity fool.
Tom Daschle: I don’t need to scream or raise my voice at all. I have the issues in my favor, the much better candidate. And yet, why do I still feel like I could say more after this.
Juan Williams: Obama played the race card, and I can say that because I’m black. Yup, because I’m black.
Bill Toolstol: Yeah, he’s feeling the pressure now. Berlin, despite all those people and everyone in the world loving it, and people her saying he had a great speech, was a disaster for him. I am so smart.
Mara Liasson: McCain got the ads out, good! The negative is done right now. What he needs to do is talk about "reform". Which actually means attacking Obama on drill, drill, drill, drill, drill. And Obama has flip-flopped.
And finally (and thankfully)
Late Edition
Wolf Blitzer: Obama changed his position based on public opinion. I like to exaggerate quotes a lot, but I just can’t help it. I am honest at heart, but sometimes, I just have this sneaky exaggeration in me that is a cover for being such an objective journalist. I know, the robot cover for what my agenda really is: following my bosses.
Nancy Pfotenliar: Obama is a liar with all this economic talk. He’s raising taxes on you, and McCain isn’t giving us gas lobbyists a tax increase. Believe me! Drill, drill, drill, drill, drill, drill. And notice how my voice gets louder and louder and louder as I argue, because I’m a smooth liar like this. I wouldn’t be a gas lobbyist if I wasn’t.
Laura Tyson: Wolf, why are you such an undercover liar? And Nancy, stop trying to steal my scarf look? Gosh, do you guys have your own idea. And I don’t need to get loud to raise my voice, because my argument, unlike yours, is true. The whole truth (and literally, she is right, and classy in her rightness!)
Tzipi Livni- Iran is scary!
Ron Kirk: Wolf, you’re the one brining up the race card
Ken Blackwell: No, your boy Obama is. And I’m one of the few black people who think that the Celeb Ad was great.
Claire McCaskill: People, it’s this simple. We love you America, we really do. We want to help you. The choice is yours.
Rob Portman: People, we want to help you. We really do. Not like the last 8 years, but something that Obama differs form us. You know the choice is yours. Oh, and drill, drill, drill, drill, drill
Joe Johns: Obama better be careful like Harold Ford. Because he is just like him. Give me a C!
Bill Schneider: And without California, this race is a dead heat! Give me a N!
Gloria Berger: And did I mentioned that McCain’s BBQ is still great and making this race close. Give me an N! What does that spell?! The Best Political Team on Television!
Goodness, how the hell do I do this.
That's it for this week. Please tune in next week for another edition of "Your Sunday Pundit/Pol Quick Roundup Show."