I posted also on DU about this issue. And I guess I need still venting. So I am, with your indulgence, post it here as well, but more in depth. So If you are interested in delving into a family divided on political issues as well as racial ones, feel free to follow me below the jump.
I will begin by posting the email I recieved from my brother. He likes to send me bullcrap emails about obama all the time. and we have had many heated discussions about obama. My sister in law, though democrat, supported Hillary Clinton and has stated that she will not vote now at all. But that is not what this is about.
This is an email I got from my brother....
Breaking News!
OBAMA LOSES BLACK VOTE !
Now here is my reponse email to him:
I am very disappointed in you, pat. That you would disseminate this kind of racist stuff. Very disappointed. If you want to pass along racist and prejudiced things, I would request that you refrain from sending it to me.
Now, I am envisioning the shitstorm. I can't help but wonder how I am from the same family. I have other siblings who indulge in this kind of 'humor'. I do not find it humorous at all.
I grew up with these little off color jokes from my dad. he thought they were funny. i thought they were not. I have listened to a litany of prejudiced things from some of my siblings and even friends. there have been times i sat silent. there have been times i stood up and cried foul. But I believe my underlying hope would be that we would move forward and step away from these weights that keep us steeped in such a divided place.
I have tried to raise my girls to believe that we are each of us the same, though we may have different skin tones. I admit I have my own problems that seemed to be unconscious to me. Growing up with one black family in our town, that we called the black family, one might not realize how that may make you think. I didn't think anything of it. We treated them the same as anyone else.
It wasn't until I moved to Tucson AZ as a Junior in High school that I realized how I felt in a school with so many black kids, hispanic kids.... the sheer number of students in the school and the size of the school vastly outnumbered my catholic school in small town wny. But I felt fear. because it was unknown to me.
But I like to think that I am more now than I was then. I never found those offensive jokes funny. And I always felt we were all the same inside. But it angers me to hear family and friends who talk about black people and hispanics in disparagaing ways. as if they all just sit around taking government money. as if 'illegals' just come here to get on medicaid and food stamps.
I say, we all have different realities. Imagine growing up in a desimated city where drug dealers rule the streets and there is no hope. I don't know that reality. When I was in Tucson, I was amazed to see a tall chain link fence surrounding the school. And when a car sat not far away with people who would come up to it every once in awhile, I had to have the fact that it was a drug dealer explained to me by my friends.
My reality has never been the same as so many other people. Did I have the greatest childhood? No. My mom died when i was 12. my dad went on food stamps when i was a bit older, and I was mortified. I moved out when i was 16. I had siblings to live with. And I had a lot of choices that are denied so many others.
Do we get angry sometimes when we feel insecure about our job or if we can pay the bills? Yes, we do. I do. But some take that and lash out at people that are not to blame. And who have less security that we do. It's the fault of people on welfare for all the ills. medicaid is the worst thing for everyone. my siblings say this.
I was on welfare. I have been on food stamps. I have been on medicaid. So when they make these assertions, I make sure they understand that they are saying these things about me. They quickly say how that's different. Somehow it's different when I avail the state of these programs. different than when these 'other' people do it. but it is not.
Regardless of a person's color or where they are from, we all want the same things. Some of us have an easier time getting those things. And when we make mistakes or do things in our lives as young kids, like my brother did when he was younger.... we have more available to us to get back on track than these 'others' do.
I apologize for this lengthy rant. It is so sad for me to see my own siblings giving in to fears and insecurities in the fashion that they do. As if black families and hispanics aren't just trying to get by like we are. I wish I were as brave as my eldest sister, who will come right out and tell them how it is. she is not afraid to rock the boat.
Though I am not as brave as debbie, my sister... I can teach my kids that we are all equal and the same. we learn different things sometimes, and we may have different challenges, but we are no different than anyone else. no better than anyone else.
ok, i am done now. and going to bed. good night. and again, thanks for indulging my ranting.