As a relatively infrequent diarist, I've decided to start a series entitled "Screw the GOP." It's a specific and semi-humorous pun related to the sexual issues posts to various right-wing blogs.
It started tonight, when one of my favorite sites - Sadly, No! linked to what they call The World's Worst-Named website.
This led me to a reading-spree of an anti-choice, anti-birth control, and even anti-condom garbage that prompted me to say: "Screw the GOP."
More about the anti-intellectual, anti-choice nonsense below the fold!
Just remember, kids.... condoms don't protect souls!
It begins with this first bit of brilliance:
I was so angry when I read about the attacks on the Pope that I cleaned up my room. Really. If these attacks continue I'll be cleaning up last night's dishes.
At least you'll be doing something useful? To explain:
The Pope is right to advance the truth that AIDS is a "tragedy that cannot be overcome by money alone, and that cannot be overcome through the distribution of condoms, which aggravates the problems."
Problem: AIDS in Africa... A place where 22 million people are infected with HIV. Solution: certainly NOT condoms!!!!
This is where it gets interesting....
As a bachelor, of course, do I really need another lesson on how to put a condom on an organic banana? No.
Ok, look.... Yes, people in modern and heavily industrialized and educated countries have had at some point in their lives encounters with a sex-ed course which includes a couple of lessons in the virtues of condom use in preventing the spread of STD's.
Then again, in the places that are the most ravaged by AIDS - like sub-Saharan Africa (where the pope was specifically decrying condom promotion) are most certainly not educated in condom use.
Our conservative friends then take an interesting turn in response to various recommendations regarding condom use... "Them evil libruls embrace the 'don't theology'"
Secularists, to be sure, believe that abstinence and monogamy are unrealistic, as opposed to fisting and foursomes. But a recycling sermon is always welcome: "Latex doesn't break down in water, so don't flush it, and it certainly isn't biodegradable," warns one educational site "so don't put it into the compost - even if it is filled with ‘organic matter.'"
Got that?
You'll notice that liberals embrace the Don't Theology when their precious political cushions are at risk. "Don't. Don't. Don't. Don't watch Fox News. Don't Read Ann Coulter's Guilty. Don't drive to work." Miraculously, though, the Don't Theology becomes simplistic when Evangelicals, Catholics or Mormons encourage their daughters to abstain from sleeping with street gangs.
More interestingly too, secularists claim that condoms are indestructible and great protectors, but what does that really mean? Seatbelts also protect drunk drivers, so what's their point? And what happens when good condoms turn bad?
As opposed to the "Don't have sex unless you're married" theology which even the conservatives all know works so well... (That was just some random Bristol Palin link - no need to click through...)
Back to the point:
That's right -- the people who are saying you should use condoms are not ONLY saying that you shouldn't dispose of them in environmentally unsafe ways... but they're also advocating that YOUR DAUGHTERS have sex with gang members!!! (That was part of the Obama platform, right?)
Anyway, now we get into some wingnut science:
For, it turns out that while STD infections are a principal cause of women's sterility, chronic disease and early death, condoms afford girls and women categorically no protection from seven of the eight STD's studied, even when used faultlessly 100 percent of the time.
Condoms may curb gonorrhea in heterosexual intercourse – but only for men!
That's right! Condoms are not 100% effective against all STD's -- which prompts a blog about "The Hazardous Condoms."
Which of course forgets that the men in places like sub-Saharan Africa (or wherever else) who might be protected from an STD like gonorrhea would then NOT go on to pass it on to another partner. And that's not a good thing?
And even the claim that condoms often hinder HIV/AIDS is questionable. Here are a few reasons seldom mentioned:
* The scientific panel studied data from several small groups of heterosexual couples, with one partner an AIDS carrier – the longest follow-up study being three years. Allegedly, if condoms are applied without fail in normal vaginal intercourse, approximately 15 out of each 100 uninfected partners will get HIV annually.
* However, there is no information on how often these "couples" actually did the "marital act."
* And, for those folks who engage in various sodomies, NIH gave no clues on rates of condom breakage and slippage. So, the data clearly void condom "security" for homosexual participants.
Oh, crap. Some of the people who used condoms might not be doing it enough for an effective study! Plus...some un-linked "scientific study" indicates that 15 out of 100 people who may have sex with an infected partner might become infected. So - CONDOMS ARE BAD! (Except, of course that 100 OUT OF 100 might have been infected otherwise?) (And let's not forget those damned sodomites!)
And let's not forget HPV.
Also relevant, condom safety claims may be killing girls and women en masse. Condoms do not stop genital HPV, the most common STD. Said Dr. Coborn, "every year, 15,000 cases of cervical cancer are diagnosed and 5,000 women die of the disease. Hundreds of thousands of other women will be diagnosed and treated for pre-cancerous condition. HPV is the cause of nearly all cervical cancer and has also been linked to prostate, anal and oral cancer."
So, sexual disease results from promoting sexual license and concealing condom dangers.
Yup, promoting condom use promotes SEXUAL LICENSE!!! (ZOMG!)
And despite that several "scientific studies" have indicated that condoms prevent HPV by...
women whose partner used a condom each time they had intercourse reduced their of contracting HPV by 70%. Women whose partners used a condom more than half of the time, but not during every instance of intercourse, reduced their risk by 50%.
So... there you have it, folks. Promoting condom use in parts of the world where people are going to be having sex anyway, and STD rates are the highest is bad...because condoms are dangerous. (Where the definition is that while unprotected sex creates a 100% risk of passing on an STD, condom use does not.)
Are these people really that ignorant?
(Apparently...)