Please stop apologizing. For twelve years, I worked as a (white) deputy sheriff, and I will tell you that the Boston sergeant was wrong, wrong, wrong. Clearly wrong.
I don’t know if his motivation was racist – that is not clear – but I do know, from his own statements alone, that his ACTIONS were wrong. Indisputably wrong. You should not appear be making excuses for them. That sets a precedent and potentially endangers everyone in the country, black, white, or magenta. It really does.
True, police work is often very difficult, very stressful, existentially frightening, and often deals with ambiguous situations. Police officers should get more constructive support. But that makes it especially important that some lines be clearly drawn and clearly held. It is not OK to arrest people because they are rude to the police. Citizens are allowed to do that. It is not OK to arrest people because they are "provocative." Period. Not OK. Not legal. The charges were immediately dismissed. This is why we have a Constitution, I thought. No?
The discussion has been shifted from the sergeant’s inappropriate actions to his person and his hurt feelings. Hurt feelings can be used as a police tactic, to control a situation; it can be very effective. However, in police work, self-control is the most basic requirement. It is the price for the authority. If someone can’t manage anger or fear well enough to control his own actions, he simply should not have police powers. Errors and slips happen, yes, but they must never be condoned.
This is a very basic civil rights issue, and it is critical to good police work. We are all hurt if you treat that behavior as acceptable, or as excusable because of personal feelings. It is not. It is simply wrong. It is an abuse of authority. Yes, this happens more often to minorities, but it happens to all kinds of people. It could happen to any of us. I am personally cautious with police these days, too. We are all at risk. If the Boston police commissioner says that arrest was in accordance with their training, they need to do some serious work there. His statement is worse than this single incident.
As a former deputy, I have no doubt that the sergeant, despite his bluster, knows that he acted inappropriately, so I don’t believe that your making it a matter for dialog and a beer is being perceived as you may assume. A good offense is the best defense, and he is conditioned to react that way when challenged. I think most police officers know that he behaved improperly, and that most of them would, at a minimum, be corrected for making that kind of arrest. (Is it acceptable now?) Actually, every indulgence of temper like this actually makes police work more dangerous for the police themselves, whether it is publicized or not (just as our torturing brown people creates more terrorism recruits).
A teaching moment for basic civil rights, ones clearly listed in our Bill of Rights, should not mean giving them away. Do we stand for any principles at all? Please don’t waffle on that.