No really. Brace yourself for the stupidest shit ever. I saw this news item posted in my friend's newsfeed on Facebook. A high school marching band in Sedalia, Missouri wanted to use the following image to illustrate their theme on their shirts, which was "Brass Evolutions":
Innocent enough, right?
WRONG.
While the shirts don't directly violate the district's dress code, Assistant Superintendent Brad Pollitt said complaints by parents made him take action.
"I made the decision to have the band members turn the shirts in after several concerned parents brought the shirts to my attention," Pollitt said.
Pollitt said the district is required by law to remain neutral where religion is concerned.
The district is required by law to not respect the establishment of a religion. Looking at the more well-known issue, teaching the theory of evolution in a scientific classroom does not constitute a violation of this law. It should be common sense by extension that doing cute artsy things with the ape-to-man depiction also does not violate this fucking law. Why? Because the theory of evolution is not a fucking religion. The theory is bound to clash with the belief systems of literal-to-Genesis creationists, but that doesn't mean teaching evolution is a violation of the Establishment Clause. An actual violation of the Establishment Clause would be teaching the theory of evolution as being the work of a theistic God, like the God of Christianity. That's not what is happening when evolution is taught in the classroom and it's certainly not what is happening when an assistant band director incorporates it cleverly into a band theme.
Here's what one of the angry parents had to say about it:
"I was disappointed with the image on the shirt." Melby said. "I don't think evolution should be associated with our school."
...
If the teachers are going to capitulate to these people, I don't think kids should be associated with this school. The assistant superintendent Brad Pollitt tries to defend himself:
"If the shirts had said 'Brass Resurrections' and had a picture of Jesus on the cross, we would have done the same thing," he said.
In doing so, he pisses too many reasonable people off. First of all, he establishes a legal false equivalence between incorporating evolution into the theme and incorporating religion into the theme. Secondly, he's full of fucking shit.
In short, the school is getting new shirts for the band because the school decided to capitulate to stupid people.
Update: Apologies for the late update. As some of the Kossacks have pointed out, there's also a poll attached to the article (it's on the right and beneath the advertisements), which as of 12:34 ET stands at:
Should the Sedalia school district have pulled the Smith-Cotton High School band T-shirts?
Yes, the evolution image was inappropriate 3%
No, critics and the district are overreacting 97%
Total Votes: 5825
Devastating, but apparently, this story is making news on other science blogs: ERV, Pharyngula, Coyne, and Orac. Pharyngula in particular is notorious for poll raids, so I'm guessing that's why the synergy of Kossacks and PZ acolytes is so devastating.
Also, apparently one of the commenters from the article is taking orders? O.o They're nice shirts, so it only makes sense.