(This is written in response to gchaucer2's excellent diary. No hamsters were harmed in the writing of this diary)
Now, I'm not saying it's true, but word is that President Obama is controlled by giant space hamsters. I'm not saying it's true, but the White House hasn't denied it, and it has the right-wing blogs in an uproar.
I'm not saying there's anything in it. No, wait, actually I am. The title and the opening paragraph were there for the sake of appearances. Actually, I am saying President Obama is controlled by giant space hamsters.
After all, at least one site* on the internet claims it. And if you read it on the internet it has to be true, right? I mean, the internet, that's all peer reviewed? It's not a series of tubes where any half-literate idiot can post anything he pleases? I mean, it's like the fucking Lancet or the European Journal of Criminology, right? That's how I know an Elvis clone married Bill Clinton's alien lovechild in Fresno last winter.
*this site actually doesn't claim it, but it has a handy classification of conspiracy theories.
Oh, it's not on the internet. A half-cocked yokel of a pundit who's on a crusade to topple the Obama administration because he met Obama on a bus 30 years ago and he tripped over the pundit whilie exiting the bus wrote it. That's a source as reliable as the Times, isn't it?
And while the claim is obviously a load of crock, I'm playing coy with you. Because the White House still hasn't denied this rotting heap of garbage it has to be true, right? Even though the only reason the White House hasn't denied it yet is because their PR wing has committed a mass suicide because they couldn't stand dealing with this moronic crap anymore?
Also, giant space hamsters haven't denied it. I call that suspicious. It's the silence of the guilty, mark my words. Never mind that we don't know whether giant space hamsters exist.
And the reason I'm posting this here is either because I'm a half-literate moron, someone who's so naive he'd buy pewtwer as platinum, or because I'm a right-winger who's managed to spout a river of right-wing talking points and am banking on the fact that people believe I'm one of the other two sorts.
But it's on the internet or written by a pundit so it has to be true. President Obama is controlled by giant space hamsters?