About a month ago I made an appointment that I've been putting off for almost six years. In spite of the fact that I'm pretty sure my craptastic health insurance won't cover it I made an appointment with and oncological gynecologist.
I have the BRCA gene. My sister has breast cancer, my mom has had breast cancer, and after many years of denial and a couple of years of therapy, I worked up the courage to call the doctor who treated my grandmother for breast cancer to get his support as I begin the process of getting a prophylactic mastectomy.
I made the appointment for September 9 at 3:30 because it was the first appointment they had available. This was weeks before the big speech was announced.
Can you imagine my reaction when I found out that the big speech was going to be today? There, was I can tell you, much swearing. At the tops of my lungs.
Because I'm not feeling terribly hopeful, thanks to all this talk about "triggers."
You see, the trigger talk indicates that conservative Democrats don't understand.
One of my biggest fears going into surgery is the grotesque expense of it and the flimsiness of my health insurance. Both my insurance broker and a representative of the company have indicated to me that surgery won;t likely be covered. They have indicated that a prophylactic mastectomy would be considered "medically convenient," rather than "medically necessary."
Every time I see my sister's oncologist, she asks me why I haven't had the surgery yet. She's an out-spoken Romanian lady, who yells at me and doesn't seem to understand how little control I have in this situation. I can barely afford my yearly mammogram, thanks to the fact that my insurance only covers 20% of preventative care. How can I possibly afford a "medically convenient" surgery?
The Blue dogs don't understand, and I fear President Obama doesn't understand that we can't institute policies for "if" the insurance companies fail us. They are already failing me and who knows-how-many-thousands like me.
When I walked blocks for President Obama last fall I didn't want to feel hopeful Hope is a feeling I really distrust. But a little hope snuck in there, in spite of me.
If the President comes out for triggers tonight, that tiny flame of hope will be snuffed. I'll go out to the garage and peel the Obama sticker off my car, where it's been for over a year.
Hey, maybe the President can get some 'blue dogs' to volunteer three nights a week for him.