It's here! It's here! After such a long wait, it's finally here -- at 6:30 on NBC and much NPR.
(And when it's done, this contribution page will be waiting for you!)
Like many of you, I enjoyed the first Brown-Whitman debate very much, as well as the lovely Brown attack ad that it generated. The second debate was less-widely seen, but led to some important moments that were worth notice.
But for many of you, the highlight was naturally my liveblogs -- or, for the second debate, not-so-liveblogs -- so I'm pleased to come here today with the third installment.
Fair notice: in case there's any doubt: I volunteer for the Brown campaign but do not -- not, Not, NOT -- speak for it in this capacity!
Remember: this is an, um, impressionistic depiction of what goes on at the debate. Think of me as Picasso rather than Rembrandt -- or, perhaps I should say, as an editorial cartoonist rather than a portrait artist, or more likely as a second-grader with tempra paint and a stained index finger rather than a sophomore with watercolors. (By the way, click that link to find some trenchant cartoons about CEO Meg-a-bucks, as well as info about the last quilt drawing of the season.) Any resemblance between what I recount and what actually happens at the debate is either intentional, if I have the time and will to present it, or incidental to my setting up the joke, if I don't. Meg has been inspiring a lot of the latter.
One reason for concern for those who remember the 2008 Presidential debates: the moderation. The first debate had one of the best panels of questioners I can recall. The second had a no-nonsense Univision anchor who kept the ball rolling. This third debate -- well, there's a phrase I wish that the people in charge had heeded:
"If it ain't Brokaw, don't fix it!"
The presence of Brokaw in the moderator's chair may foretell a more clubby, "cocktail-party-like" event where eMeg will feel more comfortable and an earnest and honest man like Jerry Brown will seem out of place in a skeptical "but you realize that you liberals can't actually solve any problems, right?" sort of atmosphere. I hope not, but I fear so.
So: the liveblog will soon commence; I won't promise to follow and port up your comments this time because I've realized that I'm just not fast enough. The the quality of the comments will inevitably exceed that of the diary, and I'd appreciate y'all not reminding me of that too much.
And so we wait for the green flag, and, here ... we ...
GO!
Q1: Please destroy your election chances by asking Californians to sacrifice.
Meg: I ask for a huge sacrifice -- I want your vote. Everyone will have to sacrifice, including the rich. Ha!
Jerry: I have a worse sacrifice to ask for -- we have to stop scapegoating people. Also, Cali rocks!
Q2: Voters are stoopid. They don't know spending cuts means service cuts. Pretend this is a question.
Meg: Voters are smart. We need to scapegoat public workers and eliminate the welfare population. I propose a Dutch Auction! Sell our poor people to some Asian country!
Jerry: sure, people don't like hard choices. I got mondo crap for "the era of limits" talk in the 70s. I'll start on the budget right after the election and will really talk to the voters. We can return power to the people, right on!
Meg: (thinks) No! Scapegoat!
Q3: Don't we need to reform Prop 13 to balance the budget?
Meg: Old people can stay in houses due to low property taxes due to Prop 13, which applies to fewer and fewer people but ever more disproportionately to corporate renters and lessees, which are the people I like most! So let's create jobs by auctioning down business tax receipts.
Jerry: No sacred cows. But Howard Jarvis voted for me -- I made it work by building up a surplus -- which my GOP successors spent. Power to the localities! Oh, and we still need a capital gain tax.
Brokaw: Meg, sic 'em!
Meg: If we don't cut capital gains taxes, everyone will die!
Jerry: 80% of the benefits goes to people making over $500,000 and they may not spend it here. Hey, Meg, how much will you save if this passes?
Meg: I'm am investor, so I'll be richer, but so will job creators. And now I will lie about you. And you regulated!
Jerry: I haven't been Governor for 28 years! What about my successors!
Meg: He's a politician -- unemployment went up!
Jerry: Yo, Meg -- ever hear of a recession? We had one in 1982!
Brokaw: I'm going to fact-check something. Brown is right.
Meg: (thinks) I WILL KILL YOU!
Q4: Doesn't the late budget show that your plan to cooperate is full of beans?
Jerry: I won't have to learn on the job. I've done eight budgets. We should start in earnest NEXT MONTH! We'll develop a workout plan, take it on the road, search our collective souls, sell it statewide. I'm not pushing for gimmicks. I'll cut money out of my budget.
Q4B: What would you change about the just-passed budget?
Meg: I don't like your question, so I'll just malign Brown. Cutting the governors budget is peanuts. We'll save $2.7 MM -- that's lunch money! I'll use the powers of Silicon Valley!
Jerry: I demand a rebuttal. I'm talking about setting a good example.
Meg: What's that?
Q5: Brown -- let's talk public pensions. We're becoming Greecey! What should happen to current pensioners? "Should they cut back on the money they should feel entitled to receive?" (Huh?)
Jerry: Hard choices. Employees will have to pay in more. We need a two-tier system through collective bargaining.
Meg: We can't touch existing pensioners. Drat. He had huge, Bell-like, pensions in Oakland. The pension benefits are lavish -- this causes all of our problems. Do not give me context. We need 401(k) style plans -- except for fire and police, hee-hee....
Brokaw: Whoa, those fire department pensions can be huge. Are they really off-limits?
Meg: Jerry is a captive of the unions! I'll be independent! We need to find a fair solution that hurts public workers.
Brokaw: Don't slither away from my question, worm.
AUDIENCE APPLAUDS
Brokaw: I forget that I was going to hold her accountable. Jerry, your turn.
Jerry: She's exempting 25% of the pension budget through public safety.
Meg: I'm not exempting public safety unions, I'm just making sure that only they get defined-benefit pensions.
Q6: Jerry, I'm asking you the WHORE QUESTION! Apologize, dammit!
Jerry: It was wrong, I apologize.
Meg: That's not befitting our state.
Jerry: Why don't you criticize Wilson for calling people whores?
Meg: That's different.
AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND HOOTS
Jerry: O RLY?
Meg: I didn't get the police endorsement because I sold my services to them for benefits to me, but because I am tough on crime not committed by corporations!
Jerry: fooey.
Q7: Prop 23, which scuttles AB 32 -- where do you stand?
Meg: Environment is nice, but our unemployment is too high, so we must sacrifice it. So I want a 1-year moratorium -- freeze and fix AB 32. Prop 23 goes too far -- because people figured out the trick.
Q7B: What's wrong with a one-year moratorium, Jerry?
Jerry: Creates regulatory uncertainty. Only Texas oil companies complain. I'm going to use less oil here and more sun and wind.
Meg: He didn't answer the question! We need to suspend regulations when we can find a plausible excuse! We can't hurt truckers -- what's wrong with a little more pollution for a while until we can delay it again.
Jerry: Your numbers are full of baloney. We'll create jobs through retrofitting.
Q8: What should be the role of teacher's unions in the state?
Jerry: OK -- how basic do I need to get? Do you know what a union does? They bargain for workers. Follow me so far? You can't just go out and try to stomp everyone you disagree with.
Meg: I am still talking about AB 32. California Teachers Association est delenda! Anything that hurts them helps us.
Q9: You're spending $120 MM, but you didn't vote. Why do we think you care about the state?
Meg: Not voting was bad, but I'm glad I'm spending my money because the unions oppose me. I don't know why other candidates don't spend $120 MM of their money like I did -- it helps me kill the unions! This is supposed to be a citizen-democracy!
Jerry: $120 MM of your cash and $30 MM from rich contributors is "citizen-democracy"? Gack! By the way, we can't create enough charter schools to cover the 95% of the children in public school.
Meg: You lie! I don't want to cut education, I want to cut education!
Q10: Meg, you said businesses and HOUSEHOLDS must be held accountable. So if you couldn't find a legal worker, why should you assume other businesses can?
Meg: We need e-verify, or possibly to tattoo everyone in the world who is not a legal U.S. resident on the face so we can recognize them if they come here. And we need a bracero program! But I don't like to Arizona law, oh no.
Q10B: Hey, AG Brown, why not hold businesses accountable?
Jerry: This is a federal problem, dude. Did you take American Government? But I did cooperate -- but we can't deport everyone, and we need a path to citizenship. By the way -- about the housekeeper, she could have at least gotten Nicky Diaz a lawyer. Bracero programs are bad!
Q11: Mexico is hurting from drug cartels because of illegal drug consumption in California. Jerry, that hasn't been a high priority for you as AG.
Jerry: Wrongo. Here's a list of what we've done to fight the cartels here. You might have asked me about this before making a fool of yourself on the teevee.
Q11B: Meg, you oppose Prop 19. What if it passes, since people can get demon weed anywhere.
Meg: Marijuana is bad. I get high on wealth! And narco offiers endorsed me, because I'll shovel money to them! ROSE BIRD! ROSE BIRD! ROSE BIRD!
Q12: How important is Prop 8 to California and you.
Meg: I'm running because of these other issues, the espousing of which helps me avoid your question. I do support Prop 8, though I like civil unions. The AG should defend that law. Shame, Jerry! It's part of the Constitution of the United States! [sic] The AG must defend it.
Jerry: Madam, the 14th Amendment makes Prop 8 indefensible. It's fundamentally wrong. On crime: I have the police officers in my back ...
Meg: Hee-hee-hee -- he was going to say "in his back pocket"!
Jerry: BAM!
Q13: Obama -- you like him, Jerry?
Jerry: He's doing a good job in tough circumstances. I'd welcome his campaigning for me.
Q13B: Palin -- you like her, Meg?
Meg: Yes, I love Mitt Romney.
Q14: Do we need to rebuild the state political process?
Meg: Have you heard my platform? We need to budget differently.
Jerry: We need a majority vote budget, not for taxes, and I'll work within the present system.
Brokaw: I didn't do as bad job as some bloggers feared! Now for a dishonest Whitman commercial!
UPDATE: Hey, there's more news on NBCLA.COM and Channel 4! I'll blog that too!
NBC4: The recent poll says 47 to 43 Brown, with 20% undecided.
Let's go to the debate site with Conan Nolan! What did you see that we didn't?
Conan: People applauded -- no way you saw this. It was also more freewheeling. Had a point-counterpoint. More interesting an extended exchanges. People were more interested in this debate -- on NBC! Brokaw was great!
NBC4: What's that chanting?
Conan: A protest!
NBC4: Let's see who leads where. Brown way up, 64-24 in Bay Area. Central Valley 47-33. SoCal 50-34 outside of LA. LA is 24% of voters -- Whitman leads Brown in LA 41-38! Brown is up only 43-40 of Latinos -- at least before the Nannygate problem arose, which makes all of these figures hooey.
BACK FROM COMMERCIAL!
Let's talk about the biggest issue this year -- the "whore" conversation.
We have experts Octavio Pescador from UCLA and Shirley Bevitch Jeffy.
NBC: Octavio, is the Whore thing over?
Octavio: Yah.
NBC: Does Whore neutralize Nannygate?
SBJ: No -- Nannygate is about what she did, not some staffer. Plus she pissed off the Latinos. She has awakened El Beast.
NBC: Octavio, will Latino voters sit this one out?
Oct: Pete Wilson of Prop 187 is her campaign head. They will come out!
NBC: Meg said Brown was a politician. Did she score points?
SBJ: Nah, the public thinks they're all liars.
NBC: She said he made half-answers.
Oct: Yeah, good one. People hate that.
ANOTHER COMMERCIAL BREAK! FEINSTEIN COMING UP!
NBC: Let's look at Facebook and Twitter! One comment pro-Jerry, one pro-Meg, one anti-both.
Oh, no -- Jon Fleischman made it onto TV! Ugh! Run away! Run away! He calls it even, meaning win for Meg.
And he is balanced -- by a commercial break!
Back with Dianne!
NBC: Senator, do you wish you were running?
DF: Nah.
NBC: Which matters most, issues, personality, or punditspeak?
DF: None -- it's who can cooperate with the Democratic legislature to fix things. Needs experience, innovation, and knowledge about government.
NBC: What about personal attacks? Is this the new normal or will it end?
DF: We have more hate than ever. I never saw anything like this. We need solutions. Experience, thoughtful -- get it? Brown said that he's reached the stage where his age makes him independent.
NBC: Out of time! How about more Fiorina commercials?
VIEWERS: NOOOOOOO!!!!!!