Via the Magic of Facebook PM, I give you Jeff Lieber!!
Jeff is in London with his family and didn't want to take the chance of posting at the wrong time due to the time difference. He knows how you guys are if MF is early or late. Heh!
A couple of weeks ago I ran into the right, honorable TexDem online and asked if I could guest host Mojo Friday because -- and I promise to donate $1000 to Bill Halter (next Senator for Arkansas) if I whorishly pimp beyond this very moment here -- I've got a TV show premiering tonight at 10PM ET/9PM CT on CBS.
The show is a good, fun, completely apolitical ride and I hope you'll give it a look-see, but -- with that out of the way -- I come not to write about current projects, but about beginnings.
In 1997 I'd been in Los Angeles for two years. The relationship I'd brought from Chicago had melted down horribly. I'd been laid off from the only Hollywood job I'd ever had (which, being me, did involve dildos). I'd just gotten over an ADULT case of the chicken pox. And -- to top it all off-- I was caught openly sobbing when the lights came up at the end of the movie Contact (to this day I don't know WHY).
So, times were pretty bad.
That said... there was SOME hope.
Based on two independent feature scripts I'd written I'd just procured a manager.
Now, this manager -- a woman named Robyn Meisinger -- and I were quite a pair.
I was a client with no credits. She was a manager with... well... no other clients than me.
So, with little to lose, we cooked up a pitch and took it out to anyone who would listen and, through a set of circumstances that are too random to recount, this pitch opened doors at Dreamworks and suddenly I was up for a rewrite gig on an existing project.
GREAT!
MORE HOPE!
Except... there was another writer up for the project and his name was John Patrick Shanley.
Academy award winning writer of Moonstruck John Patrick Shanley.
All hope dashed. I was so not getting that job.
So, in a panic, I sent the head of Dreamworks (a guy named Bob Cooper) a goldfish in a bowl with a note that said, "Little fish eat less food, take up less space and write better screenplays. Hire me."
And... lo and behold... three days later... I got the job.
I spent that entire night checking and rechecking the answering machine message to make sure I'm not being punked by... anyone.
So, a few days later I go to meet on the project and as I pass Bob Cooper's Assistant's desk I see the fishbowl... but no fish.
"What happened?"
"Oh," the assistant says casually, "Somoene overfed it and it died."
(Dramatic pause for allegorical meaning to sink in.)
Robyn and I are still together. The Dreamworks script never saw a camera or a cast. And I'm still just doing my best not to end up "overfed and dead".
And with that... off to the Mojosiphying!
Mojo Friday Guidelines
- If you comment you have to recommend all comments. (in order to receive mojo you have to give mojo. It's only good mojo manners.)
- Everything you say may be taken as a joke (so if you ask a question, expect a silly answer)
- You must recommend the diary (and pimp it unapologetically)
- You don't have to comment to recommend.
- You can't steal my idea (right, like that ain't goin' to happen)
- Please, no pictures or YouTubes until after 300 comments. Now, after 300, use a little common courtesy and be responsible in the number.
- Mojo mojo mojo mojo, mojo mojo mojo.
- TexDem (that's me) is not bound by the guidelines. Heh
Mojo Friday Goals
A. At least 300 different commenters and 1000 comments by 1:30 PM EST and 1500 by 5:00 PM EST Friday Night that it's posted.
B. 100 recommends for each comment, at least.
C. Stay on Recommend List at least five hours (this requires some strategic planning by you guys, refer to guideline #3)
D. At least 200 diary recommends. 300 would be better, spread the word.
E. And always, fun fun fun.
F. Have at least 75% average participation rate as seen here in the Mojo Friday Postgame Show by Hedwig.
G. (New) Have at least 30 kossacks over 90% participation (see here for some tips).
H. Overload the servers with recommends, not to mention dominate Top Comments Mojo list. (we do tend to mess with the site with all of our recommends at one time)(also, to dominate the Top Comments Top Mojo we need at least 50 comments with over 200 recommends, see guideline B)
I. That's enough for now. (Have a suggestion? Post it.)
MKinTN posted a diary to help everyone achieve greater success called How to Succeed at Mojo Friday Without Really Trying.
For those of you new to MF (Mojo Friday) we have our own lingo about a few things. Thank's to MF'er Jez (the link will explain) go to this diary for a little more fun and explanation. Official Mojo Friday Snecktionary.