1.
If you really want to hear about it, the first thing you'll probably want to know is why I came to Daily Kos in the first place, what groups I belong to, what diarists I follow, what my UID is, and all that David Copperfield kind of crap, but I don't feel like writing about it, if you want to know the truth. In the first place, the meta bores me, and in the second place, the site's administrators would have about two hemorrhages apiece if I told anything pretty personal about my profile. They're quite touchy about anything like that and might ban me, especially Meteor Blades. Their smart and all -- I'm not saying they're not -- but they're also touchy as hell. Besides, I'm not going to tell you my whole goddam diary history or anything. I'll just tell you about this madman stuff that happened in the last couple days since Daily Kos went to DK4. I mean that's all I told M.M. about, and he's the owner and all.
2. Style
I'm probably the biggest goddam moron on the internet when it comes to style. I really am. My next door neighbor, old Ackley, when he's not popping zits or picking his crumby toenails, is always talking about a website's color and layout. He kills me. I don't care if a website has vomity colors and a stupid look, as long as the writing is interesting. Trouble is, there are way too many interesting blogs, if you want to know the truth. But old Ackley is always bragging about the style at Huffington Post -- he calls it "HuffPo" like he's a big shot there -- but that's such a phony place. Old Arianna starts a liberal blog, then before long it looks like goddam Newsweek and even Entertainment Tonight for Chrissakes. Then she sells it to AOL for about a trillion dollars. I nearly puked when I heard that.
So I'm not the best person to ask about the new DK4 style, but I like some of it a lot. I'm not kidding. That little do-hickey in the masthead under my name knocks me out. I see other swirly things that look like clouds or croissants everywhere now. They're in my diaries and all over the right column. They class up the place. The colors are really nice too. I don't know if it's the same orange as before but it seems softer, like my little brother's hair. It was so orange you could see him blogging in the dark. He was the smartest little kid I ever knew and he was really polite to everyone online, even bastards who would HR him. You'd have liked him.
But the top half of the new website drives me crazy. I swear to God it does. I'm not sure what to do with all that white space. I mean, it's pretty and all -- I'm not saying I don't like it -- but I'm just not sure what to do with it. Should I swirl my cursor over it or just look at it for about five goddam hours? The thing is, when I log into Daily Kos, most of the screen is stuff I don't use. There's a big banner ad for some phony product I'll never buy, a bunch of white space with the Daily Kos name and the Flag Man, and the "Community Spotlight," which I still haven't figured out. I can sorta make out the headline of a Front Page story, but that's all. Then there's a Feature box that flashes at me, but I haven't gone there yet. I'm not saying I won't -- don't get me wrong -- it's just that I'm too busy trying to find content, which is down below. I do like the new fonts. There's a classy font for diary titles, a bold one for the Rec List, and the one I'm using now for diary content is really clear and easy to read. Old Ackley could tell me its name, but that font knocks me out.
3. Content
I don't like change. I really don't. Some things should just stay the way they are. You ought to be able to put them in a museum glass case and leave them alone. Once I find a hunting hat that fits or an operating system I like, I'll use them for like fifty years. I didn't go to the beta site for DK4 even once because I was afraid of not finding my way out. I really was. I had this feeling I'd never get back and I'd just disappear. Boy, did that scare me. I figured I'd get pushed into the pool on the first day DK4 launched and learn to swim. Or not.
All the new content drives me crazy, I swear to God. There must be about a thousand ways to find a diary, if you think about it. There's the "Community Spotlight" at the top, the "Recommended" list on the right side, and the "Recently Rec'd" diaries below that. Then, there's the new "Diary" link for Chrissakes. I like that page, especially that hover thing where you can read the first part of the diary. That kills me. Speaking of the hover tool, how come when I hover over screen names on the Rec Lists I don't get their UID like I used to? It just says their name. Heck, I already know that.
What I miss most is the good old "Diary Rescue." I think that's what the "Community Spotlight" is supposed to be, but I don't meet the old guys there every night like I used to. And some diaries have like 5 recs and others have 200 and stick around for days, so I'm not sure why they need rescuing. "Diary Rescue" provided hope. What I mean is, if you wrote a diary you thought was good, and it scrolled away really fast, you'd think maybe the rangers would rescue it at night. There was always that possibility. Now the diary is just gone when it's gone. I used to like finding stuff at "Diary Rescue" that had like 5 comments. A lot of those diaries were gems that hardly anybody caught before they scrolled off the list. Some of those writers probably spent like 50 goddam hours writing their diary, so it felt good to catch them and give some Mojo.
I haven't clicked on the "Groups" and "Tags" and other new watchamacallits because, like I said, I don't like change. I've figured out how to get around DK4 like I did the old Kos, and that works pretty well, if you want to know the truth. I hope people who invite me to join groups aren't mad if they don't hear back. I like everyone and all, I really do, it's just that I've got too damned much on my mind to think about other stuff. Boy, I'm crazy, I swear to God I am.
I miss some of the lists. I miss old Jotter, who was the first person I'd click on every morning, just to see what cool diaries were there. He must be good at math. It's great that "Top Comments" is still here, but I miss the Mojo list of comments. A lot of that was funny and just floored me. I know there are new tools now to track the top diaries and comments -- and a thousand other ways to sort them -- but the community part is gone from that. It's just you on your own. It's great stuff like OND is still there.
4. Functionality
I'm probably the biggest moron on Daily Kos. Take my word for it. If you don't show me exactly how to get from one page to the next, I'll wonder around on the website like a goddam madman. There are a lot of new features on DK4 that really help you move around and find interesting stuff, and there are other things that get in the way. It's like one of those Microsoft upgrades where they add all kinds of goddam stuff you don't want, but you can't get rid of it. I hate that crap.
I get a big bang out of that "Publications Manager" for one thing. I'll sometimes finish a diary at like 2 in the morning, but I don't want to publish it then because nobody will see it but a couple other bastards up late drinking scotch and sodas. But I don't want to get up at 8 in the goddam morning to post it either, so I'll use that new manager tool. Whoever thought of that deserves a damn Nobel Prize. Another thing I really like is the "List View" for diaries and stuff. It used to be if you were looking for a diary you wrote like two years ago, you had to scroll through about a thousand pages. Now you can find it in a jiffy. That kills me. And when you're in "List View" for diaries and comments and people, there are about a hundred new icons that help you sort stuff. There's stars and hearts and balloons and other do-hickies all over the place. They must've had a lot of meetings to design them.
Some other things aren't so easy, if you ask me. I use the "Welcome Back" box a lot, so I wish it was higher on the screen so it's always visible. And I wish it stayed on the screen, like when I go to someone's diary. I'd like to change the way "My Page" works too. When I click on it, it defaults to "My Stream" and there's never a goddam thing there, because I'm too lazy to set up that page. I can go to a website ten thousand times without setting anything up. I really can. I mostly check "My Page" to see if my comments were replied to, so I'd like the "Comments" page to show up first. If someone takes the time to reply to one of my comments, I don't want to be rude and all and just ignore them.
I haven't tried the Facebook thing. The truth is, I avoid that bourgeois site like the goddam plague. I have a Facebook page and all, and if people I know ask me to friend them -- God, I hate that phony term -- I'll click the "Confirm" button. But I never hang out on Facebook, so I don't know what goes on there, and I certainly don't know what that button does on this website. Even if I like things, I never hit that "Like" button. I don't want strangers to know what I like, if you know what I mean.
5. Open Thread
Last night I was reading through a diary thread and a new kid was there. You could tell by his high UID that he wasn't a Trusted User or anything, and hadn't been here long. Well, he was just jumping in and out of the thread commenting about pie. I watched his comments for a while. The funny part was, most people ignored him, but a couple others yelled at him and gave him some lousy HRs because his comments were off topic and he wasn't playing by the rules. But I just followed him jumping around the thread and talking about pie.
And then something terrible happened. One diarist I like a lot -- but I'm not going to follow him for Chrissake, he might think I'm a stalker -- got mad at everyone and started talking about writing a GBCW diary. I don't know why people do that. I don't know why they don't just leave. I really don't. But then everyone started blaming it on the guy who was writing about pie, and how his type was ruining Daily Kos. I wanted to jump in at that point and mention all the great stuff here. Like the way old Trix cracks me up, or how teacherken writes about education -- even though I hate school -- or how A Siegel posts fantastic diaries about the environment, or how healthcare is covered by great people, like nyeve, or how old OPOL goes on the best goddam rants you'll ever read. I don't even mind if little kids read all the "Fucks" in fishgrease's excellent diaries. And there are lots of stories where the charts and graphs make all the crumby economic news understandable. I'm not kidding. And even though the blog's look has changed and there are goddam trolls all over the place, the content is still intelligent -- maybe not Shakespeare for Chrissake but not lousy either -- and in some ways it's better organized now. But I didn't do that, mostly because I know I'd forget some diarists' names and make someone mad.
Anyway, I kept watching all these Kossaks complain about pie and all. Dozens of them, and nobody's around -- no site administrator, I mean -- except me. And I'm watching the crazy diary thread from the outside. What I have to do, I have to catch everybody if they start a pie rant -- I mean if they're running their mouth about pie, I'd have to step into the thread and catch them. That's all I'd do all day. I'd just be the catcher in the pie and all. I know it's crazy, but that's the only diarist I'd like to be.
So I sat there and watched the comments go around and around, with everyone reaching for the prize tip. I felt so damn happy, I don't know why.