**News Flash**
Not to be outdone by Utah’s naming of the Browning 1911 as its official state firearm, Wyoming’s legislature announced today that Anthrax has been named the official state disease.
According to State Senator Oswald Gruyere, “we gotta long ‘n nasty history in this state with them little Bacillus buggers.” In a related move, California’s senate is expected to approve a motion to declare the earthquake the official state killer, out-distancing its nearest competition, Charles Manson, by a near 2-1 margin. So far, there has been no official comment from Florida Governor Rick Scott who was expected to sign a resolution declaring the Columbia/HCA corporation as his state’s official mass murderer. Rumors persist that the alligator and chicken fat lobbies have abandoned their own campaigns for state honors. Elsewhere, Montana’s state bird, the Western Meadowlark, is predicted to lose its title to the Pterodactyl while Vermont’s legislature rejected a petition to declare poison ivy that state’s official flower.
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