Augusta, Maine April 4, 2011
Governor Paul LePage announced today that he will move to repeal the laws preventing child pornography and child prostitution in Maine. In a statement from Blaine House, he said that these laws were just the kind of government interference that made Maine an unfriendly business climate, driving these jobs overseas to Russia and Thailand. Legalizing the sex trade for minors will open up terrific job opportunities for motivated children, teach them the value of a dollar, and ingrain an appreciation of the merits of hard work. The move could also go hand in hand with efforts to develop the state's gaming industry.
Opponents of the measure expressed concern that the new policy would put older prostitutes out of work. LePage’s spokesman Dan Demeritt said those displaced would simply have to face economic realities and get a job where they actually had to stand on their feet and not lay around all day.
The Boy Scouts of America applauded the Governor's actions, saying that they intend to introduce a merit badge in "Republican Economics", and are working with several lube and condom manufacturers to come up with a design.
Officials of the Roman Catholic Diocese of Portland could not be reached for comment.
State Democratic officials said they could not condone the move, but allowed that it would prepare children for the social and economic realities of Republican jobs plans to come, and equip them to better accept future working conditions as they reach adulthood.