Mother's Day, one of two holidays that for me hold no meaning whatsoever, because, you see, celebrating Mother's Day, or Father's Day for that matter, presuppose that you actually have fond memories of, care for, and like your parents. Far too much has happened to me to be one of those people.
Putting aside for a moment the fact the hoopla surrounding Mother's and Father's Days that were put into the celebration by greeting card companies as a way of boosting sales between Valentine's and Christmas, these two holidays have always been an annoying time of year for me to say the least, and one that reinforces a moral hazard I, and I suspect many others, have regarding family.
The Bible, Quran, Torah, and every other religious text I've ever seen says that it is a cardinal sin (Haram for the muslims) not to honor and obey your parents. But what if your parents are abusive nutjobs whose entire set of interactions with you were negative and corrosive to your ability to deal with people?
As a former victim of longterm mental and physical Child abuse, I don't find any redeeming qualities in my parents whatsoever. I have no hapy memories of them or being around them at all. Period. I can honestly say that I have not seen or spoken to either of my parents for over 6 years, and, as for my father, I have not acknowledged his presence or existence, even when I was in the same room with him, in over 14 years.
Which of course leads me to my moral dilemma. if I don't honor my parents, does that make me a bad person?
I have lived abroad in far more family and group oriented cultures for most of the last decade and never discuss this with my coworkers or students (they couldn't possibly understand). Whenever family comes up in conversation, I redirect the discussion as fast as possible. I would like to think rather, that the definition of what constitutes a good moral person is incomplete and based on having a semi-functioning family, something I basically never had.
I welcome your thoughts in the comments section.