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A special welcome to anyone who is new to The Grieving Room. We meet every Monday evening. Whether your loss is recent or many years ago, whether you have lost a person or a pet, or even if the person you are "mourning" is still alive ("pre-grief" can be a very lonely and confusing time) you can come to this diary and process your grieving in whatever way works for you. Share whatever you need to share. We can't solve each other's problems, but we can be a sounding board and a place of connection.
To a griever, the New Year doesn't often feel like much of a fresh start, does it?
Given that no one volunteered to host this evening's diary, I am officially declaring this a "Grief Open Thread" - so feel free to share whatever's on your mind in the comments.
First, however, I'm going to use my moment in the spotlight to share some words that touched and helped me over the holidays. I realize that many (if not most) folks here are not religious (I consider myself a Christian mostly because I like Jesus, even though the miracle thing isn't really all that convincing or even important to me -- I am on the fence about God, and I really have a love/hate thing with the Bible all around). But regardless, my church hosted a "Blue Christmas" service for those who were feeling sad during what is supposed to be the ALL HAPPY - ALL THE TIME part of the year. I found it tremendously helpful to meditate with others about the conflicted feelings this conjures up for me.
I am newly pre-grieving a close friend who recently received a terminal diagnosis. The service was just what I needed, and this part really jumped out (again, if religion is not your thing, I think the words are still worth a read)...
"Walking With Grief" - Opening Sentence from Celtic Daily Prayer
Do not hurry as you walk with grief; it does not help the journey.
Walk slowly, pausing often: do not hurry as you walk with grief.
Be not disturbed by memories that come unbidden.
Swiftly forgive; walk slowly, and let Christ speak for you unspoken words.
Unfinished conversation will be resolved in Him. Be not disturbed.
Be gentle with the one who walks with grief.
If it is you, be gentle with yourself.
Swiftly forgive; walk slowly, pausing often.
Take time; be gentle as you walk with grief.
Thanks for being here tonight.