Oh Mitt Romney. Mittens, oh Mittens, why will you not accept the fact that you are Vice Presidential material at best?
Instead, here you go again, trying to be the Belle of a Ball the Republicans seem reluctant to throw. If a political party could Friend Zone their candidate, the Republican Party would do it in a heartbeat with Mittens.
Instead, this poor sucker is going to be the nominee when the zeitgeist against his dark Gordon Gecko past while probably be in the height of its pitchfork phase. Greed is not always good.
The group of capitalistic hoodlums at Bain were true believers in the Gordon Gekko School of Wall Street. All by the books, mind you, but historical can appear as if they were corporate looters all in the name of profit. Here is a refresher:
Wall Street, Directed by Oliver Stone, 1987
Greed, as it turns out, did not help the United States of America out at all.
Greed lead to American manufacturing jobs being sent overseas. Greed lead to predatory loans against fellow Americans. Greed lead to the end of the Glass-Stegal Act and the Great Financial Fiasco of the 'OOs. Greed leads to the pilfering of "lock-boxed" pension funds and state treasure rainy day funds.
Greed leads to the end of America's industrial era of prosperity.
For greed and profit, companies like Bain twisted and tore companies apart, gleaming any gristle for shareholders at the cost of jobs upon jobs. Until finally, America's industrial and commercial infrastructure was torn asunder in the name of short term profits over long term value.
As Bill Maher so elegantly pointed out last Friday, Mittens didn't make anything but profit. No physical product or service, just cut-throat Gekko corporate capitalism. Who was to blame him, an entire generation of hoodlums like him were pilfering America, some still are. Mittens and his ilk did not make their fortunes creating great things, they made it by dismantling or destroying them.
All except one man, a man who once met a Pretty Woman.
Pretty Woman, Direct by Garry Marshall, 1990
Spoiler Alert, this theatrical trailer is pretty much the whole movie. What is missing from the mini-movie is the subplot of Edward Lewis, played by Richard Gere, and Philip Stuckey, done amazingly by one Jason Alexander. Their characters run a destroy and pillage venture capital firm just the same as Bain.
That's the whole point of him being in LA, to destroy some shipping company and sell off the piece at a profit. Classic corporate profiteering.
Only after Julie Roberts fills an much needed void in Edward Lewis does he realize wanted to build, not tear down. He wanted to create something real, that employed real people who made a real product. His hooker with a heart of gold had rubbed off all over him. He was a changed man.
He was to use capitalism for good, not evil. Value over greed, long over short term.
Mittens made a different choice, he chose greed every time.
Mittens was never the fairy tale then, which is why he will never be the Republican Party's Pretty Woman now.
But he does make a nice pet Gekko.