DISCLAIMER #1: I'm not talking about all you earnest worriers and hand wringers. [PEOPLE LIKE ME!!!!] Those who balance their concern with reality. No, I'm talking about the straight-up wackadoodle Concern Trolls who run around screaming OBAMA'S LOSING! OBAMA'S LOSING! HE'S OVER. DONE. FINISHED. STICK A FORK IN HIM. There's a FIRE in the theater, and the sky is about to fall, and we're all going to die homeless, penniless, eating dirt, cat food and earthworms, and no one will ever love us.
So, to all the Concern Trolls and/or RedState plants, here's my gift. While the rest of us continue to encourage each other, donate, canvass, make phone calls, write sober-eyed (
aka non-batsh#t crazy) diaries about the true state of the race (good balanced with bad), you guys can spend your time eating Rolaids while feasting on the delicacies I've outlined below.
Meanwhile, the rest of us will continue eating popcorn and soda (or perhaps something stronger as needed).
DISCLAIMER #2: ONLY THOSE WITH IRON STOMACHS SHOULD VENTURE DOWN BELOW.
You've been warned.
Fried Bull Testicles
Serves: 4 Concern Trolls
* 8 bull testicles
* 2 medium eggs
* 1 cup bread crumbs
* cooking oil
* 100 grams parsley
* salt
* black pepper
Wash testicles and cut length-wise along the middle. Remove the skin and cut each part length-wise into two slices. Sprinkle some salt and black pepper on both sides of each slice.
Add salt and black pepper to eggs and mix well. Dip each slice on both sides in bread crumbs, then in eggs, and again in bread crumbs. Fry each slice in pre-heated oil on one side for a few minutes until colour changes, Turn over and fry on the other side again until colour changes. Serve with washed and cut parsley.
__________
Sour Fish Head Soup (Canh Chua Dau Ca)
Serves: 1 Concern Troll
Ingredients:
1 lg Fish head or fish carcass
1 qt Water
2 Scallions, white part only
1/2 c Canned sliced sour bamboo
1/4 Fresh pineapple, cut in a
2 ts Salt 1 ds MSG (optional)
2 tb Plus 4 teaspoons fish sauce
2 tb Mixed chopped fresh
Instructions:
An excellent way to get twice the pleasure out of your fish purchase. You can use either the fish head or the fish carcass if you wish. To the people of South Viet Nam, this is as much their traditional dish as Southern Fried Chicken is to our southerners--and it will meet with instant praise. Sprinkle the scallions, black pepper, 1 teaspoon salt, and 4 teaspoons fish sauce over the fish head. Allow to stand for 10 to 15 minutes. Bring 1 quart of water to a boil and drop in the sour bamboo and pineapple slices. Cook at a lively boil for 5 minutes. Drop fish head into the actively boiling water and, keeping at a boil, add the 2 tablespoons fish sauce, remaining teaspoon salt, and a dash of MSG. Boil the fish head for a total of 10 minutes. Transfer to a soup tureen, sprinkle on the coriander and scallion green, and serve.
__________
CURED RAT MEAT
Serves: About 5 Concern Trolls
This recipe was originally intended for wild game, such as venison or boar, but works surprisingly well with roof rat meat. This is probably best with 9 -12 well aged rats. First you need a crock that is big enough to hold the rats you want to cure. First make the brine. roof rats, roof rats, roof rats
For three gallons of brine, add to your crock: roof rats, roof rats, roof rats roof rats, roof rats, roof rats
1 1/2 lb. Kosher Salt, 5 oz. Sugar, 2 Tbs. Peppercorns, 1 Tbs. Whole Cloves, 6 Bay Leaves, 10 Tbs. Pickling Spices, 2 Onions, Sliced , 12 Cloves Garlic, crushed, 10 Small Hot Dry Red Chiles, and enough cold pure water to make three gallons.
Stir until sugar and salt are dissolved. Add rats, do not pack tightly, they need some room. A half ounce or so of Nitrate is protection against the possibility of Botulism. When the rats are in the crock, cover them with a plate, and put something on the plate heavy enough to ensure the rats will stay submerged in the brine. Tie a cloth over the top of the crock to keep out bugs. Store in a cool spot. Turn the rats every few days. A scum of white mold may form on top, but that is normal. The rats will be ready to cook in 2-3 weeks. What you don't use immediately freezes well.
___________
This last one, I just posted in another "my hair is on fire" diary.
BREADED BULL TESTICLES WITH STEWED PEPPERS AND ONIONS
Serves: 4 Concern Trolls
Prep: 15 min
Cook: 20 min
Ingredients
1kg bull testicles
50ml white wine vinegar
seasoned Flour, for dusting
2 Eggs, beaten
100g fresh breadcrumbs
2 tbsp vegetable oil
40g unsalted Butter
1 small bunch flat-leaf parsley, leaves picked from stalks
For the vegetables
1 large onion, peeled and finely sliced
3 garlic cloves, finely sliced
1 large red pepper, seeds removed, sliced
1 large yellow pepper, seeds removed, sliced
3 tbsp extra virgin olive oil
100ml water
salt and pepper
Method
1. With a sharp knife, split the tough skin-like muscle that surrounds each testicle and transfer to a large saucepan.
2. Cover with water and vinegar. Bring to the boil and simmer for 15 minutes, until tender. Drain and rinse under cold water until cool. Slice each testicle into 1cm thick ovals and set aside.
3. While the testicles are cooking, tip the sliced onion, garlic and peppers into a large pan. Add the extra virgin olive oil and water. Cover and cook over a high heat for about 10 minutes, until soft. Season well and set aside.
4. Toss the sliced testicles in the flour, followed by the beaten egg and finally the breadcrumbs. Heat a large pan with the vegetable oil and fry, in a single layer, for 3-4 minutes until golden. Add the butter, let it sizzle for a minute and stir in the parsley.
5. Season the testicles and serve with the stewed peppers.
These recipes will keep you so occupied (
between hunting, trapping, cleaning and cooking all that tasty game) you'll be too busy to be ... er ...
CONCERNED.
Enjoy!
6:42 PM PT: Post Script: If we can't laugh at ourselves, then we are truly doomed. Our humor (dark, light, black, whatever) and the fact that we are a reality-based community is the key to keeping each of us motivated and sane.
To be brutally honest, after the debate I seriously contemplated spending the day in bed with the TV off all week. But there was too much to do and my prez needed me. He needs all of us.
So yeah, it's okay to feel down and discouraged, but God forbid we start acting like them! They have lost the ability to laugh at themselves. They have no sense of humor. All they have is bitterness, hate and rage. They leave their weakest links to their own devises, basically abandoning them (how Ayn Randish, huh?) and allow the strongest, most virulent voices to prevail. But we don't do that. We keep each other in check. We motivate our members, and we call out Crazy and Despair whenever they rear their destructive heads. That's why I joined Kos. I saw something here that I admired.
That's also why we will win because we have humor AND rage, only we know how to channel ours best. I trust this community--even those I disagree with--because I know deep down that we basically want the same things. And that's more than enough to fight for.