So here's my idea for a citizen crowd sourced youtube political commercial.
Most people have seen the very funny youtube video by the satirist Chris Crocker about a deranged Britney Spears fan yelling at the world to "LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE". It has had about 44 million hits as of this morning.
So now that Mitt Romney has asked that his business experience should not be a subject for debate in the campaign -- and has also pretty much ruled out discussing his taxes, his implementing Romneycare in Massachusetts or even his governorship of the state, his actual policy proposals, his plan to raise revenue and close tax loopholes, and just about everything other than, well I guess trees being the right height, and "Obama's failures," can we just summarize his campaign slogan as being "LEAVE MITTENS ALONE!!!"?
In case you haven't seen it, here is the video that garnered 44 million hits and countless imitations, and below it is my first draft of the Leave Mittens Alone video script. Is there anyone who can perform this and video tape it and get it up on Youtube within the weekend news cycle?
How fucking dare anyone out there make fun of Mittens after all he's been through.!
His dancing Austrian warmblood horse lost the Olympic dressage event, he went through a retroactive separation from Bain Capital, his dog strapped to the roof of the car crapped all over the hood! He has five fuckin kids!
He loves his wife's couple of Cadilacs! He loves his elevators for his couple of Cadilacs!
His campaign staff turned out to be a bunch of losers, and his tax accountant a cheater, his company fired people and bankrupted companies and sent jobs overseas, and now he's going through a campaign battle. All you people care about is….. voters and how me was making money off of firing people!
HE’S A HUMAN! Sort of! Humanoid at least! (ah! ooh!) What you don’t realize is that Mittens is making all this money and all you do is write a bunch of crap about him!
He hasn’t worked at Bain, governed Massachusetts or PAID TAXES in years ... His campaign theme is “give me more” – more tax cuts, the presidency, BECAUSE HE DESERVES IT – for a reason!! But all you people want and all you people want is MORE! MORE-MORE, MORE: MORE JOBS, HEATHCARE, SOCIAL SECURITY!
LEAVE MITTENS ALONE! You are lucky he even condescended to run for president to be your leader – you BASTARDS!
LEAVE MITTENS ALONE!…..Please.
President Obama is talking about professionalism and the economy and immigration, and said if Mittens was a professional she would’ve pulled off talking about issues no matter what.
Speaking of professionalism, when is it professional to publicly bash someone who is going through a hard campaign???
Leave Mittens Alone Please…. !
Leave Willard Mittens alone!…right now!….I mean it.!
Anyone that has a problem with her you deal with me, because his circuitry is not well right now.
LEAVE HIM ALONE!!!
(Please feel free to add suggested lines in the comments section!!!)