this is a update to sani and his bout with laminitis and for me, too - and the next storm blowing through. fortunately, he is not the one "directly" affected. indirectly, yes, because it impacts my being able to have funds necessary to cover his current vet bills and past board. this awesome community raised half of what i owed one and a half month ago and i've been hoping to bring in the rest PLUS the now two months extra i owe (would LOVE a calendar that has a snooze button on it!)
the good news - sani is now 2/3 new feet! his farrier and vet are miracle workers. MOST horses that are as severely laminitic as sani - with undiagnosed and untreated cushings disease (like with people, dogs, etc., this is a tumor on the pituitary) don't survive. it CAN be controlled in animals with pergolide when caught in time - the drug slows the growth of the tumor and brings the horses back to near normal. one of sani's
"mares" at the barn has been on pergolide for 10 years and at nearly 30, she is in great shape!
laminitis is a side effect of the cushings and his insulin resistance. yes, now i have a horse with insulin issues as i had mr tee, my precious sammy, who was a 2x a day insulin boy with full fledged diabetes. i cooked for him. for sani, i have to search for special hay and special feed.
i do this all in love for he is so worth it!
we were on our way to catching up - then i've been feeling punk this last week - not doing much with the jewelry making - just didn't feel good.
then, yesterday morning, about 6:25, i woke up out of a dead sleep with the most excrutiating pain in my right below my diaphram that migrated to my midback and upper shoulders. i felt like i was in the grip of a giant crab intent on squeezing harder!
the pain was blinding - i hobbled to the bathroom and tried to "will it" away. my willpower failed me bigtime!
in minutes, i was drenched in sweat to the point i looked like i'd just stepped out of the shower. not good. not good at all!
then the weakness from my left shoulder region so i was now doubly worried. the first thought orginally flashing through my head was "GALL BLADDER" when this happened, but since my dad died in less than a minute of feeling discomfort when having his heart attack, i decided that the e.r. was my destination - hopefully not my final one!
ekgs and ultrasounds and seems my gall bladder is trying to grow a mountain - tons of little pepples! doc craig was surprised i'd never had an attack prior to this! guess i'm really just lucky!
so, it was so severe that my new surgeon scheduled me for surgery on wednesday! that's right - tomorrow!
yep - i go under the knife in less than 48 hours from the first attack! (24 hrs from now) recovery time is approx two weeks. sigh...
sigh. i can't win sometimes.... but i'm not feeling sorry for myself. i STILL have to raise the board balance. and, at least, i know i'll be home to do the work since i'll not be doing any heavy lifting for the next two to three weeks!
recovery time is perfect - sani will be ready to go back to work in a month - and hopefully, sani will be healthy and ready to ride by then! YAY!!! at least this happened BEFORE we got under saddle again. in the meantime, i'll be loading my koskatalogue with lots of great gifts for christmas and starting a gofundme page with rewards for jewelry yet unmade!
so - the good; sani's feet, the bad; gall bladder, the ugly, barn is pressing for the balance i owe and i've now got medical stuff to boot.
thank god for medicare and kaiser - at least, i am covered for most and thanks to being old, i don't have to try to "tough it out" because i can't afford to see the doctor.
we need medicare for all. period!
now, one last little plea - anyone wanna go shopping?
koskatalogue lists my etsy shop here.
if you want to order something special not on the katalogue, you can through contacting me and using paypal (mine is edrie dot blackwelder at paypal dot com)
or you can go to gofundme to see what i'm offering custom at custom prices.
and, please say a little prayer, send energy, think of me at 1:30 tomorrow (wednesday) - at least this is laproscopic...general anesthesia, though. i'll be incoherently home tomorrow nite, so no promises i'll be online. (hah - i'll be here - incoherent but here! i'm ADDICTED!!!)
this is my often used motto - when things are down...
but my current version goes like this!
OR RATHER ON TUESDAY>>>>and WEDNESDAY!!!
the sun 'll come out
tomorrow!
bet my very last dollar
that tomorrow -
comes good hay!
The feed 'll be at the barn
Tomorrow
and i'm lookin' for more dollars
so tomorrow
gall stones go away!
Just thinkin' about
Tomorrow
Clears away the gallstones,
And the pain
'Til there's none!
When I'm stuck with a day
That's gray,
And lonely,
I just stick out my chin
And Grin,
And Say,
Oh
The sun'll come out
Tomorrow
So i gotta hang on
'Til tomorrow
Come that hay
Tomorrow!
Tomorrow!
I love ya
Tomorrow!
please make these
stones
go way!
goes with this one....
but this is where we are right now - sani and me...
time is on our side... i believe that to the bottom of my...
and, god wlllng,if i can find a buyer for my motor home before thanksgiving - there is a baby samoyed puppy with his name on my heart!
i would give anything to just not be overwhelmed by debt, physical ailments, worry, anger, sadness AND a daned bad gallbladder - just to have a human life fo a whie.
i don't want much from life - really - from the time i was a toldler, this pretty much summed up my wishes...
and this...
and this i used to sing... everywhere... (talk about insecurities...)
i still have the original 45 record today.
and a bit more good news - going to be getting my real estate license while i wait for the courts to resolve mom's estate - that is getting officially put on the calendar this week.
AND the good news is that my travel plans over that issue remain intact since they booked me in so quickly.
i'm doing a "gofundme" and my etsy shop and will be spending some time reloading it while i am bed bound. so, if anyone is looking for some spectacular christmas gifts while helping a wonderful horse and a grumpy old lady who is facing losing body parts....
any questions or requests, kosmail me!
thanks for listening to our tail of woe!
going to go chill out now on the tylenol with codeine. and trust in better days to come.
and saving the best for last!
happy feet... pardon the shakiness - i was too excited! he's lost the weight he needed to lose and he is on the way to recovery and now maintenance!
will be here off and on - have to go bag sani's food for the next week before the day is done and make sure he is set for this surgery, too - just in case there are problems.
wish me luck!
2:49 PM PT: FYI - every time i have had to ask for help, it tears a bit of my heart to pieces. i NEVER had to do this until my sister embezzled my mom's estate. that will be corrected, but it just kills me that i am in this position due to the greed and avarice and jealousy of my "only" (birth) sister.
through this site, i've learned, though, that i have many REAL "sisters" and "brothers" who love me and i love in return - the great orange is my chosen family and i am grateful to you all for helping me emotionally get through what has truly been hell on earth.
10:44 PM PT: i know this has probably fallen off the list but i wanted to say that the reason this is here is that remembrance's diary a while back helped raise half of what i needed - i was working on refilling my etsy shop to raise the balance when this gall bladder attack happened. i hadn't planned on having to have surgery - but as soon as i am out of the hospital, i'll be back to filling the shop.
i don't want to ask for money - i want to EARN it. i've always worked for what i love and need... now is no exception. i've just run into a damned speedbump.
sometimes, i keep hoping i'll catch a break - but with my luck and osteoporosis, i don't dare verbalize that because of what that "break" might end up being!
thanks for reading...
e