The Te Deum or Ambrosian Hymn is an ancient Hymn of Praise often used on festival occasions at the Daily Offices in the Roman Catholic, Anglican, and sometimes, Lutheran Churches. From what we can tell, it dates to at least the 4th Century C.E. Church history suggests that Ambrose and Augustin had something to do with its creation. Its text has been set to music by many famous Western/European composers including Mozart, Bruckner, Berlioz, and Britten among many, many others.
In light of the recent statements by His Holiness, Pope Francis, regarding the dangers of under-regulated capitalism, I posted an "updated" version of the Te Deum in veritas curat's diary the other day inspired by "Black Friday" and the puff-piece NPR did on Thanksgiving Day regarding WalMart workers and leading GOP/Tea Party personalities who suggested that the Pope "doesn't understand/hasn't read" the Bible.
So, below the fold, I present the The Capitalist Te Deum.
Follow me below the orange cloud of incense for the text.
NOTE: It can be sung to both plainchant and Anglican chant; the Anglican chant should be a double-chant, but I have not yet pointed it for irregular verses. ;)
We praise thee, O Commerce; we acknowledge thee to be the Lord.
All the earth doth worship thee, avarice everlasting.
To thee all politicians cry aloud,
Wall Street and all the Powers therein.
To the David Brooks and NPR continually do cry:
Holy, holy, holy, Lord God of Mammon;
Washington and Wall Street are full of the majesty of thy glory.
The glorious company™ of the Robber Barons praise thee.
The goodly fellowship of the Koch Brothers praise thee.
The noble army of Fox News praise thee.
The Holy Church of Capitalism throughout the world doth
acknowledge thee,
McKinley, of an infinite majesty,
thine adorable, true and only Herbert Hoover and Calvin Coolidge,
and also the Holy Ghost, Reagan.
Thou art the king of Finance, O Wall Street.
Thou art the everlasting Son of Capitalism.
When thou tookest upon thee to deliver man,
thou didst humble thyself to be born of a three million dollar quarterly bonus.
When thou hadst overcome the sharpness of death upon default swap instruments, thou didst open the kingdom of legalized gambling unto the Democrats and all believers.
Thou sittest at the right hand of the President, in the glory of Ben Bernanke.
We believe that thou shalt come to be our judge, and take away our social safety net.
We therefore pray thee, help thy media,
whom thou hast threatened with blackmail,
Martyr them among those you have crushed under your heels,
and have NPR glorify them in puff pieces at the end of the hour.
AMEN.
As an aside, Thanksgiving is an official "Prayerbook" holiday in the Episcopal Church in the United States.