Once upon a time......don't all good stories start out that way? I was thinking about fairy tales the other day. Honestly, I love them. Not the ones we see these days, but the ones of my childhood....dark, Grimm, scary, but often with a happy ending. I'm a sucker for a happy ending.
Those early fairy tales taught me quite a lot about how the world works. They prepared me to face my fears, meet challenges, and know when the Handsome Prince was full of it and I'd be better off with his best friend.
Turns out, we still need our fairy tales...now more than ever.
Climb over the Orange Satin Pillow, and we'll give this a little more thought.
We all know the classics...the one about the orphan who got to go to the ball. There's a meme currently enjoying rather a lot of popularity that says...
Turns out, it's pretty spot on. The sanitised fairy tales we've been fed, suggest that some Knight In Shining Armor is going to come save us, if we're pretty enough, sweet enough, subservient enough. And he will give us all we need and all we should want.
What utter bollocks!
I think we can spot the fallacy in that argument from a woman's perspective. Kick off those glass slippers, get a pair of these..
and strut your stuff. Or, a pair of sneaks, house slippers, flip flops, or just run barefoot. Being genuine is far more intriguing than any set of glad rags that had to be made from magic. Make your soul sing with magic, and you're onto something!
Kicking those heels through a glass ceiling is a whole lot more worthwhile than sitting around waiting for the Prince to come solve all the problems. That poor bugger has enough on his plate as it is, and being asked to read minds and satisfy a woman's every whim is just unfair! Why should he have to? Aren't we clever enough to say what we want, and mean what we say? Of course we are...and we shouldn't allow ourselves to be talked out of it because it isn't "feminine". It may not be "feminine" but it surely is ''womanly". And honest.
Now. About that Prince. Every man has it in him to be a Prince. And it amazes me just how often the Prince could use a little rescuing as well. It's a tough world out there, and the rules of manhood have changed in the last few decades. We want men to be open and caring, and still be "manly". I think that needs a little work...and a lot more compassion! A little loving kindness goes a long way. Empathy. Compassion. Laughter. A cold beer. And even if the cold beer turns out to be a diet soda with exactly three ice cubes in it...it truly is the thought that counts.
One thing we learn from all the epic tales...fairy, elves, warlocks and dragons....is that we get through life when we rely on each other, trust each other, and support each other. We get it wrong, often enough, that's true. But remember when I said I'm a sucker for happy endings? I am.
I believe it's entirely possible for the orphan to go to the ball in fairy-dusted glad rags and show off her dance moves for the Prince. I believe it's entirely possible for the Prince to spend a fair bit of time getting to know the orphan, and whether she likes glass slippers, black stilettos, or combat boots, and how she likes her coffee. I believe the Prince is smart, capable, man enough--without the title, and just as frail and human as the orphan. When we love each other, we put in the effort, and we do it by being real with each other.
Do they live happily ever after? Not as long as there are plumbing issues, car payments, in-laws, outlaws, colds, minor annoyances and major hassles...and bosses who are a bit less than wired correctly. But here's the thing...when we get over the fallacies of the sanitised fairy tales, and remember that the witch really was going to eat those kids, that the orphan's evil stepmother might very well have been a black widow, that armies march and people die, and the world is a scary, dangerous place...even without magic....then we can face life head-on as the adventure it can be. The one where people meet as equals, where they care for and about each other.....and they take that love and trust out into the world, and transform it. We face our fears and we transform them:
The glass slippers and the glass ceiling both disappear. In their places, we work for justice, for equality, for the right to love whom we love.
And we do it by taking the lessons of the old fairy tales...the lessons of love, honour, compassion, decency, doing right, sharing what we have and what we are.
Yeah. I think I can live happily ever after with that.
Live with no excuses, love with no regrets.
Let's try that for a bit.
So....what's on your mind this evening? Do you have a favourite fairy tale that taught you important lessons? Do you have some fairy dust tucked away that you might like to share? Pull up a chair around the table and kibitz a bit.
Everyone is welcome here.
Kitchen Table Kibitzing is a community series for those who wish to share part of the evening around a virtual kitchen table with kossacks who are caring and supportive of one another. So bring your stories, jokes, photos, funny pics, music, and interesting videos, as well as links—including quotations—to diaries, news stories, and books that you think this community would appreciate. Readers may notice that most who post diaries and comments in this series already know one another to some degree, but newcomers should not feel excluded. We welcome guests at our kitchen table, and hope to make some new friends as well.