Shia Lebeouf has recently been in the news because he plagiarized a man named Daniel Clowes, and then later plagiarized an apology that he posted on twitter. However, let's face it, many people already hated the guy long before that ever happened. And the truth was, there was no real reason to hate him. The guy comes across as emotionally disturbed, but hardly as an arrogant Hollywood elite who thinks he's better than you. In fact, if you look closely at his attitude, he is probably one of the least likely people in Hollywood to have such an attitude. So why do people hate him so much? I'm not entirely sure I understand why. Some people claim that it is because they don't like his movies, or his characters, but is that really a reason to hate someone? I say that it is not. Some would say it's because of ridiculous things he's done on the news, but considering the people who hate him for that haven't met him, and he never did anything personal to them, that also makes me wonder. Why do we "hate" people that we have never met? Who don't even truly affect our lives in a significant way? Hatred for politicians is understandable, as they can pass or prevent the passing of legislation that greatly affects our day to day existence, but celebrity hatred is another animal entirely. It's a voyeuristic attitude that plagues many of the people in the world, but with each passing generation it seems to get worse. Not only do we worship people we have not even met, who don't affect our lives beyond vapid entertainment, we also hate them, when we don't even truly know the actual person we are hating.
But I'm not here to talk about hatred. I am here to talk about rape. Recently Shia Lebeouf alleged that he was raped at an art show, a project called #IAMSORRY, wherein he sat with a paper bag on his head, in silence, and allowed fans to take turns basically doing what they wanted with him (within reasonable limits of course). One journalist claims that when he took the bag off, to see Shia's face during the event, he was sobbing. While I am not happy about his plagiarism, there is a point where people deserve forgiveness. He did not murder anyone, he did not do any harm, he was sorry. But that's still not what this is about. Like I said, this is about rape, the previous was just for context. I am making this clear because I am going to be quoting Shia's own words about the event, and I want people to know there may be triggers if you have had a traumatic experience of this nature in the past.
In Shia's own words:
“One woman who came with her boyfriend, who was outside the door when this happened, whipped my legs for 10 minutes and then stripped my clothing and proceeded to rape me.”
http://www.theguardian.com/...
He doesn't get into much more detail about the particulars, but who would want to? I'm sure it was very hard for him to speak up at all. It's hard for anyone, male or female, to speak up about an experience with rape. It's traumatic, and people feel ashamed, and they also know that people may not believe them. That last part is particularly important, because it seems that many people just aren't willing to believe him at all.
Some of his collaborators on the project made clear that they realized what was happening and actually put a stop to it, but not before much had already occurred. They explained that they didn't call the police because the woman basically ran out of there, and at the time, in the moment when they broke it up, they weren't even sure what was going on yet. After this happened, it seems Shia still continued the event anyway, he still stayed to continue the project, and allow the fans still in line to see him. His collaborators explained this, by the way, after Piers Morgan asked why the woman was allowed to walk away. In a way, that was a somewhat reasonable question, but their answer makes perfect sense. No one had time to get her identity, no one was even sure what was going on at first, they just realized something odd was happening in the room, and went in to stop it, by then it was too late.
I remember watching this guy back on Even Stevens on the Disney channel when I was but a little kid. I wasn't particularly a fan of the guy -- I found his character to be somewhat annoying -- but I could always tell there was a troubled person behind the character. He's always had a tough time trying to find his place in the world, and I think some people shut off their empathy for others if the person is rich or famous, as if having money makes them immune from emotional distress. I may be one of the poorest people you'll ever meet, but I can tell you right now that I understand money can't just make emotional problems, or mental health problems, disappear like magic.
So, when I read about this, I started to feel for the guy even more than before, and then I read the comments on many of the news articles about the story. And then I got angry. Really angry. Just, so, so fucking angry that I wanted to put my fist through my monitor and scream at the heavens in a bloody rage. Most of the comments, on every story about the subject, are people claiming it never happened, belittling him, saying he's just out for attention, and much, much worse than that. The ones that really made me the most furious though, are the ones that claim he could have just stopped it. And the ones that claim that he couldn't have had an erection and been raped if he wasn't fully willing. Many were claiming male rape was actually impossible. It boiled my blood, and shows just how absurd and damaging the rape culture is to our society. It's the same thing women hear. Were you aroused? Then it wasn't truly rape. You didn't claw the shit out of them even though you were afraid they might hurt you worse if you fought back? It wasn't truly rape. You were a male? It couldn't possibly be rape. You wore revealing clothes? It was your fault. You were in the wrong part of town? Your fault, not rape. A woman forced themselves on a man? Impossible, not rape. It's the same thing women and men hear constantly and it's the reason so few of them are willing to tell about it.
And the truth is, male rape is probably vastly under-reported, not just because men are afraid of not looking manly, in our testosterone obsessed society, but more importantly because they are way less likely to be believed than women. Unless you say they were raped by a guy, that's probably more believable, because so many people are still bigoted against gay people like me. And this is a serious problem. It's a problem for women too of course, and it's the biggest problem with our rape culture. People are not believed, and oftentimes they won't come forward because all they are likely to get out of it is scorn and ridicule, after already enduring great trauma. It makes me sick to my soul, and I'm so damn tired of it.
And there's another myth I'd like to lambaste to the depths of hell itself, the idea that just because of matters of physical strength, that rape is impossible. People who have not dealt with truly traumatic experiences, in the moment, do not understand the psychology of trauma. When something terrible starts happening to you, or being done to you, completely out of the blue, you cannot predict how you will truly react in that moment. You may even be physically stronger, but you may not feel that way in the moment. You may be feel powerless, afraid, ashamed. You may be fear that they have weapons, or some way they could hurt you if you resist. You simply do not know, and cannot ever predict if you will be able to simply fight off your attacker, and stop them, even if you are physically stronger. You do not know how you will hold up mentally and emotionally in such a situation. And that's why whenever someone is raped, and the usual suspects start opining about how they should have tried to physically resist harder, I want to shout at them in fury until I'm hoarse. You do not know. You were not there, it was not you, and it was not your traumatic experience. You cannot know what happened, or what was going through their head. If someone says they were raped, instead of belittling them, and questioning every facet of their actions in the situation, in an attempt to claim that they were not "actually raped", we should be supportive, and help them in any way we can. What is wrong with society that I even needed to type that last sentence? Have we, as a society, completely gone mad? Were we ever sane? Why should anyone, in our modern age, need to write that we should be supportive of rape victims and take their stories seriously?
I may not particularly like his work, I didn't like that he plagiarized, but if he says he was raped, I believe him. And I hope that he can find healing and peace. I wish him all the best in the world, and I hope that him sharing his story helps others to share their stories as well. No one should ever be belittled for sharing the traumatic experiences they endured. They should be shown unconditional love instead.