Jesus rode me. Grr.
This sort of thing really ought to be confined to the imaginations of satirists, but so much of conservatism is, these days
A Missouri lawmaker has proposed what ranks among the most anti-evolution legislation in recent years, which would require schools to notify parents if "the theory of evolution by natural selection" was being taught at their child's school and give them the opportunity to opt out of the class. [...]
“It’s an absolute infringement on people’s beliefs,” [State Rep. Rick Brattin (R)] told the Kansas City Star of requiring schools to teach evolution. “What’s being taught is just as much faith and, you know, just as much pulled out of the air as, say, any religion."
State Rep. Rick Brattin does not know the difference between documentable scientific evidence and pulling your beliefs out of the air, and he'll be damned if he's gonna have any Missouri kids understand it or even hear about it.
God help us all if Brattin ever figures out the origins of mathematics. We must work to keep this information from him, my brethren.