I read a blog post by EJ Johnson (Magic Johnson's son) this morning: It Shouldn't Take Magic to Be Accepted
And yesterday I read a wonderful post by Jonathan Capehart of the Washington Post:
Mourning Stormé DeLarverie, a mother of the Stonewall Riots
Each of these pieces is worth their own read but the reason I'm bringing them together in this diary is to say Thank You. Confused ? Over the fleur d'orange
I've shared here that my son is gay. He came out to us his Junior year in HS and I'm not going to go into his coming out story because it's not mine to tell and feels exploitative. Even before he came out to us, I was a fierce ally but as with anything, when your child is directly involved? That's transformational.
The universe was wise enough to send our child to us because unlike some of the stories with which we are all to sadly familiar, that is not the case for a lot of LGBT kids ( adults too). As a parent, I will never understand that. Never. EJ's story is similar to my son's. He too was born into a family who loves him unconditionally.
We have much work left to do as a society to do right by our kids but especially our LGBT kids:
For so many LGBT youth, the story is very different. While the news is full of civil rights victories like marriage equality, LGBT kids in the thousands are still being kicked out of their houses every day, just for being themselves. At an age when they should be planning an exciting future, they lose everything: their homes, their families and sometimes even their lives.
It's shocking how many LGBT youth are living this nightmare. An estimated 320,000 to 400,000 LGBT youth face homelessness every year. And the streets are harder on us. According to one study, 58 percent of homeless LGBT youth are sexually assaulted, versus 33 percent of heterosexual youth. Forty-four percent of homeless LGBT youth report being asked on the street to trade sex for money, food, shelter, or drugs, compared to just 26 percent of heterosexual youth in the same position.
I know his parents are proud of this young man for knowing who he is and also using the access he has to be a voice for others who haven't been as lucky.
What's that got to do with the Capehart piece? I was familiar with the history of Stonewall and the sea change of events it started, but I wasn't aware that a woman named Stormé DeLarverie, a lesbian of color was at the forefront. This resonated with me particularly because as I've previously mentioned, my son is a gay man but is also a bi-racial man. Like my son, Stormé DeLarverie had to bridge the challenge of intersectionality. There appears to be some debate about who threw the first punch at Stonewall but clearly this was someone who was at the forefront:
And while the spark of the Stonewall Riots has many fathers and the details of who did what when remain in dispute, Kaiser believes DeLarverie deserves credit she never sought to claim for herself.
Outdoors in the summer heat, the mood was festive, but many eyewitnesses also remember a febrile feeling in the air. Several spectators agreed that it was the action of a cross-dressing lesbian-possibly Stormé DeLarverie-which would change everyone’s attitude forever. DeLarverie denied that she was the catalyst, but her own recollection matched others’ descriptions of the defining moment. “The cop hit me, and I hit him back,” DeLarverie explained. For the first time in history, “The cops got what they gave.” This had never happened before. . . .
Stormé DeLarverie remembered, “Stonewall was just the flip side of the black revolt when Rosa Parks took a stand. Finally, the kids down there took a stand. But it was peaceful. I mean, they said it was a riot; it was more like a civil disobedience. Noses got broken, there were bruises and banged-up knuckles and things like that, but no one was seriously injured. The police got the shock of their lives when those queens came out of that bar and pulled off their wigs and went after them. I knew sooner or later people were going to get the same attitude that I had. They had just pushed once too often.”
Now to why I tied these together. Without people like Stormé DeLarverie there might not an EJ Johnson, an out and proud gay black man using his voice for others. There might not be young men like my son who will write his college Senior thesis in part on intersectionality of being black and gay in America.
That's why I tied these two together.. Two very different stories both of which hit home. Maybe in keeping with my two sides of the same coin discussion from a few days ago.
Finally, I want to say thank you to all of the LGBT members of the kosmunity.
commonmass recently had a diary in which he invited people to share their coming out stories. LGBT Pride 2014 - First Things First- First Coming Out
Reading some of the stories there is what really got me thinking about writing a diary to say thank you. Then I read the two pieces I've included and it all morphed together.
Thank you to those who led the way. Thank you to those who stood strong despite the pain and obstacles. Thanks for making it possible for "kids" like my son to be able to be who they are.
Please feel free to mention other LGBT pioneers in the comments.