So long, farewell.
Texas Rep. Steve Stockman will be leaving Congress after the November elections, but if you've lost out on your chance to be one of his interns you
still might be in luck. He's
looking for a few to close out his term.
The House’s most unique and courageous conservative seeks smart, happy interns (of all ages and backgrounds) for the remainder of the year. Alas, we cannot pay you.
Given the trouble the Steve Stockman campaign has had keeping track of their monies, "we cannot pay you" is an understatement.
Personality and ideology are important. Please bring a confident, vigorous intellect and no drama. Ideal candidates will be true patriots who can count up to 17 in trillions, and care more about future generations than they do about sucking up to current leadership. Mushy pleasers/appeasers keep walkin’. HINT: vapid granolas who fear guns, hate babies, are ashamed of America, and think Islamic terrorists and illegal aliens are just misunderstood will not be comfortable here.
The ad also notes that "this Member is not a jerk," which is an important thing to say but also rather provably wrong based on, well, you know.
It's unclear why Stockman needs more interns; there's precious little work the House will be doing between now and Ever Again. Did his old interns leave, or die, or achieve a higher plane of conservativeness? Who knows. But now's your chance—wow one of America's very worst elected officials, and maybe you'll be given a few weeks to absorb what we'll say is his "wisdom."