'This is the thing with the candles, right? I love candles.'
Oh, 2015. You are not off to a very promising start
Texas Sen. Ted Cruz, a likely Republican presidential candidate and a vocal pro-Israel hawk, is being advertised as a featured attraction at a string of ritzy resort vacation getaways catering to religious Jews.
Cruz, along with several rabbis, is listed as a speaker at four different vacation spots, including Aspen, over Passover, the spring holiday that honors the freeing of enslaved Jews in Egypt.
I cannot imagine a person so boring as to find Sen. Ted Cruz the featured attraction
of anything. You put Ted Cruz in a spoon museum, the featured attraction
would be the spoons. You put Ted Cruz next to a life-size butter sculpture of Ted Cruz, more people would want their picture taken with the butter sculpture than the person.
(And as a side note: Aspen is a prime Passover destination spot for "religious Jews" honoring the freeing of enslaved Jews in Egypt? Really? We may need to redefine religious here.)
The Prime Hospitality Group is the company behind the offers, according to an email solicitation shared with POLITICO.
“4 Questions. 4 Cups of Wine. 4 Sons. And 4 Luxurious Prime Passover Programs,” the invitation reads. “All featuring unparalleled service and The Prime Group’s legendary cuisine.” [...]
The one at the St. Regis Monarch Beach offers “some of the greatest rabbis and scholars of our time including Rabbi Lord Jonathan Sacks, Rabbi Eli Mansour, Rabbi Marvin Hier, Rabbi Abraham Cooper and Senator Ted Cruz.”
Imagine being in a room full of people who are deeply, earnestly interested in Ted Cruz. No, really: Imagine being in a room where four rabbis get up to speak and then, as a capper, Sen. Ted Cruz stands up to deliver his closing thoughts on all that stuff they just said.
If this isn't just an elaborate setup for the world's best punchline, I'm going to be very disappointed with everyone involved.