Thought I'd crane my neck and took a gander at the hidden diarrheas. I was goosed by the number of attacks. It seems like it is taking a tern for the wurst.
Trust me, I can duck, should anyone complain about the pun-nishment.
Speaking of Turkeys, Sarah Palin decided to drop her pay-per-chew-word-salad programming. It is now free for the unwashed masses. I'd post a link, but for the REALLY SCARY EXPRESSION on her face. Warning! The audio pops on automatically, so be ready with a puke bag if you are caught unprepared.
From the Church of Ineffable Stupidity:
Given the number of flubs, dubs, and Cubs-like fielding being displayed by the GOP, the only thing that shocks me is that they are all still running.
Trump is doubling down, until he seeks Chapter 11 protection for his campaign: I will build a great wall — and nobody builds walls better than me, believe me —and I’ll build them very inexpensively. I will build a great, great wall on our southern border, and I will make Mexico pay for that wall. Mark my words. Mark MY words. That was the SANEST thing he has said about immigration and immigrants.
Carly Is a Real Nowhere Ham, sitting in a nowhere land, getting not a vote from you and me. Carly's ship is sinking, her campaign's a stinking, Carly, the world ain't at your command. Oops. Not ship. Airplane: “Unlike Mrs. Clinton, I know that flying is an activity, not an accomplishment”
Christie appeared on Fox, MSNBC, CNN, all at the same time, (it was a wide angle lens) and tried out a new "Accountable, but not responsible" line to cut through all those pesky librul questions who cannot understand that he is the chosen one. Dead ducks take wing better than Christie. Even for someone auditing the "How To Run For President Seminar, he got a "FAIL"
Rick Sanitorium keeps finding new feet to stick in his mouth, after thoroughly chewing off his own. "If you’re a print shop and you are a gay man, should you be forced to print ‘God Hates Fags’ for the Westboro Baptist Church because they hold those signs up?"
Ben Carson had this to say: "I think what's happening with the veterans is a gift from God to show us what happens when you take layers and layers of bureaucracy and place them between the patients and the health care provider." (When asked about the deaths in VA hospitals) A gift. A fucking gift. Better yet, a FUCKING GIFT from god. Ben obviously practiced his neuro-surgical skills on his own frontal lobes.
Walker is too scripted to cite, JEBushBush is saying nothing worthy of a quote, Paul is convincing people that only half his gray matter genes were ever transmitted to his genetic structure, and no one on this flat earth can recall who Kasich is.
Cruz: “Net Neutrality’ is Obamacare for the Internet; the Internet should not operate at the speed of government.”
Much like Guy Fawkes, Perry's BP quote cannot be forgot: “From time to time there are going to be things that occur that are acts of God that cannot be prevented.” He actually said that.
Christie: “Marijuana is a gateway drug. We have an enormous addiction problem in this country. And we need to send very clear leadership from the White House on down through the federal law enforcement. Marijuana is an illegal drug under federal law. And the states should not be permitted to sell it and profit from it.” Sorry, but just like the speaker, his quote just has to be oversized.
Jindal: "We've got to stop being the stupid party. It's time for a new Republican Party that talks like adults. We had a number of Republicans damage the brand this year with offensive and bizarre comments. I'm here to say we've had enough of that." And WE are here to say, "Welcome to the Klown Kar.
Graham:
Naw, that would be piling on.
The funniest part about the Klown Kar, with something like 16 village idiots running for the nomination is that they are all crowding so far to the right side of the Kar, that there literally is no one left to steer.