In a show of solidarity and to encourage Trump supporters go to the polls, three volunteers have agreed to let Trump shoot them on 5th Avenue. Presidential hopeful, Donald Trump, will shoot them on Halloween evening. The exact location and time are yet to be determined.
Melissa Davenport of KZTV interviewed the people who have volunteered to be shot by Trump.
William Robert Carter was standing next to his pickup with a Confederate flag licence plate wearing a “White Power” t-shirt. Mr. Carter has been a Trump supporter from the start. “It would be an honor to be shot by Trump,” he boasted. “I’m a yuuge 2nd Amendment guy so this would be a triple honor, supporting both Trump’s election and our most important Amendment.” When asked what other Amendments he supported, Mr. Carter said “respecting the Sabbath” was a good one, but he couldn’t remember any of the other four.
Anna Beth Crenshaw was sporting a “Women for Trump” shirt with a large hand print centered below the words. “I love that Trump talks and thinks like us. Them others speak all political corrected.” Ms. Crenshaw said, “When Trump said he could shot someone on 5th Avenue and his peoples would stick with him, I called his campaign and volunteered to be shot. I never in my wildest dreams thought they’d chose me.”
Tyrone Williams is the third person Trump will be shooting on Halloween. Mr. Williams was wearing black slacks, white shirt, and sporting a black bow tie. Unlike Carter and Crenshaw who are white, Mr. Williams is African American. “I don’t really want to be shot,” Mr. Williams explained, “but I work at one of Trump’s hotels. As you know, business is way down and layoffs are coming. I was assured that if I volunteered to be shot, I would not be in the first round of layoffs. I have a wife and two kids to feed.”
Trump campaign manager, Kellyanne Conway, said it was unlikely that any of the three volunteers would actually die. First, Trump will not shoot to kill but only to wing them. Second, Trump isn’t a very good shot.
While none of the three volunteers have health insurance, Kellyanne pointed out that hospitals are required by law to treat gunshot patients whether they have insurance or not. “We need something to jumpstart our campaign,” Kellyanne said. “This shooting, just 8 days before the election, could be the October surprise everyone is expecting.”