I can safely say that the fundraiser is over, thanks to a very generous donation. Thank you so much, Daily Kos!
Seriously, I looked at the PayPal site and my reaction was about how Twilight over there looks. I even said “what” a few times.
So I shall endeavor to do forth and be awesome, and I will write the best diary I know how when the new laptop gets here.
Thank you all so very much. Has anyone mentioned that DKos can really be the best? :hugs everywhere:
It’s almost 8pm, and we’re almost there. There’s just a bit more than $100 left to get it to the total.
You all have been amazing. This has been only one day, and all but $100-odd has been raised. It’s almost heartbreaking.
You see, SSI isn’t really supposed to be your main resource. That’s what I’ve been told by numerous government officials. You’re supposed to have a spouse or family taking care of you, with SSI giving you some measure of independence. A car. Spending money. Being able to buy clothes that you choose. A, heh, computer. Not...everything. Not rent, utilities, emergencies, furniture, all that. They look at me and say, “But that’s impossible. It’s not what it’s for. Really, who’s helping you with regular expenses?” And they shake their heads when I tell them that there’s no one.
So thank you for helping me with this. Because this is my window on the world from my very isolated little town in Maine, where I can’t afford the gas to get out very often.
Thank you.
As of 1615, there is only $145 left to go! Thank you, everybody! If my math is right, that’s ⅔’s of the way there! :happydance: 💥
I have to step away to bring Sally to her class. I’ll be back when we’re done. I hope that I’ll be able to tell you that I’ll soon be able to order the laptop! :hugs:
Hello, I'm LoreleiHI.
I feel I may need an introduction because I haven't been here in the comments pretty much every day the way that I used to, and writing diaries about my life first as a homeless woman, then how you navigate the social service network as a deaf woman in Maine.
I haven't been gone because I've been upset. I've been reading nearly every day on my phone and iPad! But commenting is nearly impossible, and writing a diary on an iPad is an exercise in frustration. Woe unto you if you check a tab the way you would on a computer, it you don't manually save—all your work will be lost. (This paragraph was once much more elequent. I tried to find how to do a superscript. Alack.)
But why the change? My laptop lived a good life. I bought it open box some 4-5 years ago. The battery died almost 2 years ago—it's stayed plugged in since then. It's been slow and stuttery, but I could manage without it doing its real job as long as I had social interaction, but now the screen won't turn on more than once in ten times, and more and more of those times it's so dim as to be useless.
I’m deaf. My computer is my outlet to the outside world, living way out in Cornish, Maine as I do. And my doctors have long precribed video games as a way to help me stay off the heavy pain medication I hate so much. But they are all on Steam, which needs a fairly decent PC to run.
Without social interaction, I sink into depression. Without a way to block pain signals from my brain, I end up on more pain medication and 1) hate myself, 2) get accused of drug seeking because “you didn't need this much before”, and 3) well, right now I'm simply unable to get the pain meds that wouldn't get me the medical doctor side-eye because the dog’s flea/tick meds came first, Maine decided to charge for all my meds (which at that point wasn't an issue), and then my car needed work. :shrug: I'm hoping the dog food makes it to the end of the month. (I'm babbling. This month has been wretched. My friend died alone in her apartment.)
Stay on target!
I spoke with a lovely local Kos member about wether this diary would be a good idea. Not only did he think it was, he found the perfect laptop for me (I put it on my wishlist for ease of access). ☺️ It would do everything I need, it's really inexpensive for what it is (heck, it's not much more than that open box I got!), and while it's not the Mac I tell people I want (although that would make my TBI devices more efficient), it's what I actually need at this time.
I asked advice before writing this because my brain weasels were telling me that it was wrong to ask for help, that I don't deserve to have a working link to the outside world, that pain is just what my life is meant to be.
Those are all things my abusers told me. I'm working on it with my therapist, but sometimes things happen that set me back.
I thank everyone at Daily Kos for everything that you've already done for Dervish, Sally, and me, and I'd be more than grateful if you could help again. If you want to help the pups out, and give them some joy and happiness (Sally loves puzzles), I'll put my Amazon link here.
I’ll do my best to keep up with the comments, but that’s not something this old mini does well. I apologize in advance.
Much love,
Lorelei
Sunday, May 8, 2016 · 11:20:36 PM +00:00 · LoreleiHI
The title was previously “Unlike Mr. Universe, I lack Tech”.
Maybe that was too flippant and nerdy. I was trying for levity I don’t feel. I feel very alone and lost right now. I know that it’s Mother’s Day, and that’s part of the problem.
Twice a week I open a Skype window to have a chance to talk to my kids. They haven’t answered since the end of the first month since I moved here (it still makes me cry when I think of my son saying ‘I have to go, Mom’), but I’m still there. My iPad isn’t fast enough to keep up with lip-reading, it’s barely fast enough to keep up with my typing.
I know that it’s Mother’s Day and many of you are busy. But it’s also the day when I open that Skype window, write a message and hope.
I know that I’m asking for help again, and it makes me feel terrible. But if 20 people donated $25, that would be enough.
I miss going into C&J. I miss the comments sections. I miss the community here and elsewhere. My community here, in this building, has been cut in half. I don’t want to lose more.
Thank you.