Many of you may have read (or seen video of) the speech given by Utah’s Lieutenant Governor Spencer Cox at a vigil held for the victims of the Orlando attack. If not, it’s worth checking out: www.ksl.com/...
It’s the story of a man growing beyond the institutions that had limited his understanding of the world. Of a man who apologizes in no uncertain terms for prior history where he didn’t respect others.
And yes, he’s a Republican. I’ll get to that.
Let’s look at part of what he said:
I grew up in a small town and went to a small rural high school. There were some kids in my class that were different. Sometimes I wasn’t kind to them. I didn’t know it at the time, but I know now that they were gay. I will forever regret not treating them with the kindness, dignity and respect — the love — that they deserved. For that, I sincerely and humbly apologize.
There’s a lot to praise here. Acknowledging causing a harm. Taking responsibility. Not defensively doubling down like so many people do when they have been on the wrong side of history.
But I want to focus on one specific thing in the speech. Where did his personal growth come from?
Here’s his answer:
Over the intervening years, my heart has changed. It has changed because of you. It has changed because I have gotten to know many of you. You have been patient with me. . . . You have treated me with the kindness, dignity, and respect — the love — that I very often did NOT deserve. And it has made me love you.
In a word: Conversation.
Personal conversation on an individual level, helping one man grow beyond the fear of otherness that he had been taught.
And behind each conversation, the courage of certain other people (we’ll never know who they are) to be true to themselves, to get past fear, and to communicate honestly.
Laws are incredibly important. Every court decision that recognizes civil rights is something to celebrate. Election results matter. A Republican politician speaking in favor of recognizing diversity is notable. But those are just the headlines.
Every headline moment is the distillation of millions of personal conversations over the course of years. Many of these are started by people who take considerable personal risks every single time.
Today, just like any other day (but especially today!) is just the right time to talk with people you may know about celebrating diversity and transcending the fear of otherness. Communicating in personal terms about the harm often caused by that fear.
Whether you are LGBTQ or simply know someone who is (okay, that’s pretty much everyone on the planet and everyone in orbit too) you have standing to speak about this. I’ll even say you have the responsibility, especially if you are straight or more generally in the privileged ranks.
If the person you are talking with is religious, the concept of Divine Diversity may be a helpful way to connect: www.ourdailyjourney.org/...
In Genesis, there was orderliness and harmony, a beautiful fusion of distinct realities. ... God’s design was not for a world where everything was the same, but rather a world where all things (with all their multifaceted uniqueness) were gathered together in Him. Creation’s harmony existed because of its shared life in God, not because of any flat unanimity.
This is a matter of conscience, and it’s okay to pose it in those terms. The deeply held orthodoxy of a political party or a segment of society will only change when enough people decide they cannot in good conscience participate in something that is so harmful.
Spencer Cox clearly understands this matter of conscience.
Ultimately, there is only one way for us to come together. It must happen at a personal level. We must learn to truly love one another ... And perhaps, most importantly, try to love someone that is different than us. For my straight friends, might I suggest starting with someone who is gay.
It may not be easy to see, but I think it’s the beginning of the end for publicly sanctioned fear of our LGBTQ community. In just a few years gay slurs will be recognized as being just as offensive to racial slurs — something that has no place in any part of society or the public sphere.
That’s just one step on the long road to fully protecting everyone’s rights and some day seeing the end of horrific events such as the recent attack, but it’s an important one. And it’s something we can all help with — one conversation at a time.
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Kossacks, please check out this novel: Stilled Lives, The T-Town Murders by our own gchaucer2:
www.amazon.com/…
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James Wells is the author of The Great Symmetry, a science fiction novel that celebrates the freedom of ideas. www.thegreatsymmetry.com