From the GREAT STATE OF MAINE…
Energize An Ally Tuesday
Today Donald Trump is flying over the ocean, the big ocean, the big vast yuge ocean, to visit Puerto Rico, which is an island, an island that sits in the big vast yuge ocean and…sorry, am I getting too technical? He had to explain oceans and islands to me six times before the light bulb finally went on. So THAT’S the big blue mass on my maps! Hallelujah, mystery solved.
Anyway, our unhinged leader is heading to Puerto Rico (where most of the light bulbs are still off) to promote whichever MAGA hat he’s wearing, present the island of 3.5 million with a golf trophy, and probably wish his fellow American citizens “a good time.” God give ‘em strength. The hurricane was bad enough.
If you haven’t yet donated to a relief agency, may we suggest the Hispanic Federation’s “Unidos” Fund for Puerto Rico Relief, which was recommended to us last week by our own Denise Oliver-Valez. And this guy...
To donate via text, compose a new text message for number 41444. Type UNIDOS (space) YOUR AMOUNT (space) and YOUR NAME. (For example: Unidos 100 John Doe) Then press “send” and click on the link to complete your donation.
To donate via website, click on this link and select “Puerto Rico Hurricane Relief Effort” from the “I would like to designate this gift for” drop-down menu in the lower right corner.
Thanks for helping out. Oh, and by the way: that San Juan mayor? A gazillion cheers to Carmen Yulin Cruz for standing up to the blunderer-in-chief.
Cheers and Jeers starts below the fold...
Cheers and Jeers for Tuesday, October 3, 2017
Note: If you're going to be in the southern Maine area on Saturday, November 4th, please join the DKos crowd for another legendary New England Kossack Fall Meetup starting at noon. The place: The Farm Bar And Grille at 57 State Street in Kittery (just across the New Hampshire border). Great menu---big portions. To RSVP or get more info, email Kossack nhox42 at nhox42 [at] gmail.com. Hope you can make it!
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By the Numbers:
Days since the Children’s Health Insurance Program (CHIP) ran out of money because Republicans tripped over their own shoelaces and let it expire: 4
Days 'til the Trailing of the Sheep Festival in Idaho: 1
Amount that the 1981 Reagan tax cut added to the federal deficit: $208 billion
Amount that the 2001 and 2003 Bush tax cuts added to the deficit: $1.5 trillion
Percent of taxpayers with incomes between $50,000 and $150,000 who would pay more under the Trump tax plan, according to the Urban-Brookings Tax Policy Center: 30%
Amount the GOP ended up spending to defend Tom Price’s House seat for every day he was in Trump’s cabinet before getting shit-canned: $81,000
Years O.J. Simpson spent in the slammer before his release Sunday: 9 years
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Puppy Pic of the Day: Attack of teh zombie puppehs!!!
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CHEERS to a little Nostradamus with your morning Eggos. The whip-smart (and pleasantly snarky) people counters at PPP released a report last week that suggests Republicans may be in for a real---oh, pick your word---thumpin’/shellackin’ 13 months from now. A few major reasons:
Democrats picked up big wins in special elections in Florida and New Hampshire this week, and PPP's newest national poll finds there might be a lot more where that came from. Democrats continue to hold a double digit lead on the generic Congressional ballot at 48-37, which should position them to pick up a lot of seats across the country next year. […]
The health care debate is having a bad impact on Republicans electorally. By a 19 point margin voters say they're less likely to support a member of Congress who voted for the healthcare repeal bill---48% say they're less likely to vote for such an incumbent next year to only 29% who say they're more likely to. […]
Voters continue to have concerns with Trump's general temperament. … A plurality of voters---47%---consider Trump to be mentally unbalanced to only 45% who consider him to be mentally stable. … And for the fifth month in a row we find voters in support of impeachment---48% favor it, to 43% who are opposed.
Plus there’s that little Mueller investigation that could drop an ACME anvil on the GOP’s head at any moment, and far higher voter enthusiasm on Team Pussyhat than Team Deplorable. Obviously, though, it’s too early to be poppin’ any champagne corks. But by all means, feel free to sock away a bottle in the back of the fridge. The way Trump’s administration is disintegrating before our eyes, h he may soon have no one left to fire but himself.
JEERS to America: land of the guns, home of the gun nuts. What happens in the wake of the massacre in Newtown Aurora Binghamton Tucson Santa Barbara Charleston Lafayette Roseburg Kalamazoo Orlando Alexandria etcetera etcetera etcetera Las Vegas during a concert (59 killed, 516 wounded by a good guy with a gun right up until he became a bad guy with a gun) is depressingly predictable: gun control advocates will wisely suggest that this might be a good time to review our federal and state firearms policies so that our nation's shameful record of gun violence might be improved upon. The president and his minions will blame Democrats for the carnage and urge every living soul and their pets to arm themselves to the teeth, and the NRA will continue scaring politicians into looking the other way by informing them that, "We'll be scoring you on your response." Like I said, predictable. Depressingly.
P.S. The Onion, coming perilously close to reality, again:
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JEERS to visiting the scene of his crime. After enjoying his twenty-somethingth vacation weekend at one of his golf resorts, today Lord Dampnut will fly to Puerto Rico to pretend-survey the destruction caused by hurricane Maria and made worse by his slow-motion response.
He’ll shuffle around in his stupid USA hat (available at his campaign store for a $40 donation to his legal defense fund...er, reelection fund), stroke his own ego by proclaiming that it’s “the greatest relief effort in the history of the world,” toss a few boxes of beef jerky through the driver’s seat window of someone’s pickup, rely on his favorite crutch---the thumbs-up sign---because he has no idea what else to do, and then turn tail, having made no lasting impression whatsoever except with a few pundits who will claim this was the vital “pivot” we’ve waited 8 months for. On the bright side, we can reasonably assume he’ll be distracted enough to avoid whipping out the football and nuking North Korea. So…a good day!
CHEERS to bright medals for bright minds. It's Nobel Prize Giving-Away Week---that most wonderful time of year when I can confirm that, relatively speaking, I'm one dumb-as-rocks sumbitch with a brain that resembles avocado dip past its sell-by date. The latest winner announced yesterday in the "Medicine or Physiology or Dessert Topping" category hails from…USA! USA! USA! Three scientists---one who lives in Maine!---are sharing the prize for their work on circadian rhythms, which has particular implications for people employed in jobs that require rotational shift work, or as one researcher calls it: “a constant state of jet lag."
The body clock---or circadian rhythm---is the reason we want to sleep at night, but it also drives huge changes in behaviour and body function. The US scientists Jeffrey Hall, Michael Rosbash and Michael Young will share the prize. […]
A clock ticks in nearly every cell of the human body, as well as in plants, animals and fungi. Our mood, hormone levels, body temperature and metabolism all fluctuate in a daily rhythm. Even our risk of a heart attack soars every morning as our body gets the engine running to start a new day. […]
"If we screw that system up we have a big impact on our metabolism," said Prof Russell Foster, a body clock scientist at the University of Oxford. He told the BBC he was "very delighted" that the US trio had won, saying they deserved the prize for being the first to explain how the system worked.
Unfortunately, the scientists have given up trying to use their circadian rhythm research to fix our president’s fucked-up behavior. No matter what they try, he’s always in the dark.
CHEERS to 24 hours of vittles and gratitude. This country is SO…EFFING…STINGY…with holidays and free time in general. It's like relaxing = mooching or something, and it's ridiculous. But at least Honest Abe Lincoln gave us a little respite when he was president. On October 3, 1863, he gave a speech in which he proclaimed the last Thursday in November as "Thanksgiving Day." Then the tryptophan kicked in and he fell asleep. Slacker!
JEERS to Buckeye Theater (of the absurd). Over the weekend Governor John Kasich (R-OH) told CNN’s Jake Tapper that he might quit the Republican party. Kasich says he’s tired of supporting disastrous and sadistic conservative policies on voter suppression, trickle-down economics, LGBT rights, reproductive freedom, climate-change, green energy, guns, police brutality, defense spending, immigration and education as a Republican, so he’s leaning toward supporting disastrous and sadistic conservative policies on voter suppression, trickle-down economics, LGBT rights, reproductive freedom, climate-change, green energy, guns, police brutality, defense spending, immigration and education as an independent. Such a trailblazer, that one.
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Eleven years ago in C&J: October 3, 2006
JEERS to the bloviator. Okay, I'm going to let you take your pick as to which Rush Limbaugh comment from yesterday's broadcast is the bullshittiest:
1) Rush on PredatorGate: "The bottom line is: Don't be fooled. [Democrats] don't find what happened with [Rep. Mark] Foley even the slightest bit wrong. This is just an opportunity to point fingers. Sex scandals in Washington? Not new. Page scandals? Not new."
2) Rush on how good Democrats are at smearing: "Republicans couldn't smear a bagel with cream cheese. It's not who they are!"
If you answered "1 and 2 and everything else he says," you win a free Oxycontin prescription. When's a good time for his maid to drop it off at your place?
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And just one more…
CHEERS to lovebirds with longevity. "Barack and Michelle...sittin' in a tree...K-I-S-S-I-N-G!" President Barack and First Lady Michelle Obama celebrate their 25th wedding anniversary today. To put that in perspective, that's longer than any of Donald Trump's, Rudy Giuliani's or Newt Gingrich's three marriages…or Rush Limbaugh's four. Never in my life have I seen a POTUS-FLOTUS team that so effortlessly embodied the ideals of marriage. They were (and still are!) so in synch and clearly still in love a quarter-century later. Their genuine affection and support for each other (not to mention their kids) was inspiring, permeating everything from haughty state dinners to raucous campaign rallies to public service campaigns to readings of Where the Wild Things Are at the Easter Egg Roll. You simply could not see these two having a great time together and not break your face smiling. During their tenure, the White House was transformed from Fortress Bush to its proper function as The People’s House. (You will never see a troop of Girl Scouts having a campout on the lawn during the current occupant’s reign.) Here…enjoy a few memories:
I’m told that the traditional 25th wedding anniversary gift is silver. I’m also told that the 26th wedding anniversary gift is an apology note to the Lone Ranger.
Have a tolerable Tuesday. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial:
"If the kiddie pool can't be fixed, then I'm not going to be able to splash in Cheers and Jeers. Period. That's the end of it."
---Gov. John Kasich
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