From the GREAT STATE OF MAINE…
Hey! It’s C&J’s Annual Fundraiser!
I always enjoy it when some jerk comes up to me and says, “I can’t believe Daily Kos pays you to write this crap.” I look ‘em dead in the eye and snarl, “You’re wrong. My readers pay me to write this crap.”
Pro layout tip: always make sure your visuals support the content of your copy.
Exercising questionable judgment by supporting my crappy column for 11 years makes you, by definition, a norm-breaking, boundary-pushing, trail-blazing badass rebel, and I’m proud to defend you against all the C&J-bashing jerks. Thanks to your financial support, I’ve been able to enjoy many of the finer cat foods and seasoned noodle mixes that life has to offer.
So this is the start of my annual week-long fundraiser to keep C&J alive and kicking for another year. Many blood moons ago, Kos set up PayPal accounts for both one-time donations and recurring monthly donations. The recurring subscriptions are hugely helpful so I don’t have to beg so loudly, but you’re free to pick whatever works best for you:
One time contribution: click here
$5 monthly contribution: click here
$10 monthly contribution: click here
$20 monthly contribution: click here
To send a donation via snail mail, the address is:
Bill Harnsberger, 16 Pitt Street, Portland, ME, 04103.
If you're already a C&J monthly subscriber and you want to continue, you don’t have to do anything but sit back and feel good about your investment.
Thank you for supporting my column all these years. I began popping them out to maintain my sanity during the Bush years, and here we are again, holding on for dear life in the age of Trump. But at least this time there’s actually some indictments!
Cheers and Jeers starts below the fold...[Swoosh!!] RIGHTNOW! [Gong!!]
Cheers and Jeers for Monday, January 8, 2018
Note: Today we are all stable geniuses. Except Trump because, well, duh.
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By the Numbers:
Days 'til Trump horrifies real doctors by getting a physical at Walter Reed: 4
4 days!!!
Days 'til the Morro Bay Winter Bird Festival in California: 4
Minimum number of LGBT Texans who are running for office in 2018, including five transgender candidates: 40
Minimum size of companies in Iceland that must now get government certification that they’re paying their female employees as much as their male ones: 25
Percent chance that Mark Zuckerberg says his annual “personal challenge” is to “fix Facebook” including prevention of bullying and interference from nation-states: 100%
Length of the newly-discovered prime number (divisible only by itself and 1) M77232917: 23,249,425 digits
Current worldwide gross for Star Wars: The Last Jedi: $1.2 billion
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Puppy Pic of the Day: Unusual markings for a dachshund….
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CHEERS to the big bump. And now a brief word from America’s independent book sellers to author Michael Wolff:
“Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You
Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You Thank You!!!”
And now another brief word from America’s independent book sellers: Sequel!
CHEERS to professional perspective. I admit that before the release of Fire and Fury, I had a vague sense of who author Michael Wolff was, but nothing that would tip me off to the iron-cladness of his reputation. With Trumpbots claiming he’s just a hack who made everything up, I was happy to run into this column by Matthew d’Ancona at The Guardian. With former stints at The Evening Standard and The Spectator, d’Aconda’s no flaming libturd. So it’s good to see this professional endorsement, and also his total facepalm over the stupidity/gullibility of Trump’s handlers:
Were I running a modestly sized whelk stall, let alone the White House, the very last person I would allow behind the scenes to observe and report on its secrets would be Michael Wolff.
Although unlike real terriers, Mr. Wolff doesn’t eat his books.
Please understand: the author of Fire and Fury, the book that has rocked Donald Trump’s presidency, is a brilliant journalist. Having commissioned and edited his work in the past, I can vouch for his terrier-like pursuit of the truth and his diffident charm when handling his subjects.
That’s precisely why no remotely competent adviser would have given Wolff a backstage pass to the working life of a president who knew nothing about politics or policy, had expected (even wanted)to lose, and had no intention of reining in his blowhard, bullying persona. It says so much about the amateurism of the team around Trump that Wolff was allowed to be, in his own words, a “constant interloper”. The very existence of this book by this author tells a story in itself. It is a case of form perfectly matching content.
I have nothing to add, so I’ll just mosey on to the next item. Mainly because I’m rapidly losing the willpower to prevent myself from moving that period inside the quotation marks. (Like nails on a chalkboard, Britain...)
CHEERS to timeless advice. Seventy-seven years ago this week, in 1941, Franklin Roosevelt gave his famous "4 Freedoms" State of the Union speech, including this part:
"[T]here is nothing mysterious about the foundations of a healthy and strong democracy.The basic things expected by our people of their political and economic systems are simple. They are:
» Equality of opportunity for youth and for others.
<<<<<<<<<<<< Hey, Democrats! There’s your campaign message for the 2018 midterms right over here! You’re welcome. ---FDR
» Jobs for those who can work.
» Security for those who need it.
» The ending of special privilege for the few.
» The preservation of civil liberties for all.
» The enjoyment of the fruits of scientific progress in a wider and constantly rising standard of living.
These are the simple, basic things that must never be lost sight of in the turmoil and unbelievable complexity of our modern world."
Read the rest here. And then give generously to a secret underground ex-New-Deal-president cloning lab near you.
CHEERS to the happy meeting of X and Y chromosomes. Today is National Male Watcher's Day. Seriously…it's a thing. Far be it from me to deny you the simple pleasure of viewing the male form in all its glory, so ogle away:
Don't say I never did anything for you. Like, say, give you nightmares.
CHEERS to humble beginnings. On January 8,1790, President Washington delivered the first, and deliberately bland, State of the Union address (here's ye olde transcript). Today he'd shock the teabaggers out of their knee socks:
"Uniformity in the currency, weights, and measures of the United States is an object of great importance, and will, I am persuaded, be duly attended to."
That's right---the father of our country wanted to take your currency, weights and measures and redistribute their uniformity to everyone else. Damn socialist hippie. Impeach!
CHEERS to sports shorts. The winners from the weekend pigskin playpens are the Tennessee Titans, Jacksonville Jaguars, Atlanta Falcons, and New Orleans Saints. They'll move up the ladder in their quest to be the team that has the distinct honor of being the tyrants whose blood the New England Patriots will use to water the Tree of Super Bowl LII. And in other sports news, the winners over the weekend in the NHL were, as usual, the dentists.
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Ten years ago in C&J: January 8, 2008
CHEERS to home vegetation. Out on DVD today: the gritty western 3:10 to Yuma and the director's cut of one of my favorite movies of the year, Zodiac. Oh, also some straight-to-video flick called White Noise 2. As if one documentary about Republicans on the campaign trail wasn't enough.
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And just one more…
CHEERS to U.S. Mint'y freshness. Here’s something coming out of the government that won’t make us either dive in our fallout shelters or throw a brick at the TV: five more "America the Beautiful" state quarters will be released this year. The collection, which celebrates our national parks (or as Republicans call them, "drill here, drill now" zones), continues to weave its spell of numismagic on the nation for a ninth year. Here's a sneak peak at this year's lineup, which includes three birds, two lighthouses and a kayak. I think you'll agree they're quarterrrrrific:
Pictured Rocks National Lakeshore in Michigan
Apostle Islands National Lakeshore in Wisconsin
Voyageurs National Park in Minnesota
Cumberland Island National Seashore in Georgia
Block Island National Wildlife Refuge in Rhode Island
The first release of the year, due February 5th, commemorates Michigan’s Chapel Rock. It’s a large, odd-shaped structure made out of stone with improbable foliage on top of it and a gaping hole in it that never closes. I can’t understand why they didn’t call it Trump’s Head Rock.
Have a tolerable Monday. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial:
Michael Wolff, author of the new bombshell book Squirrels and Candy Corn: Inside Bill in Portland Maine's Kiddie Pool, told the BBC in an interview broadcast Saturday that he believes understanding revelations resulting from his book will "finally end Cheers and Jeers."
---CBS News
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