Due to Saturday’s events, I felt I needed to address it, as a proud Jew and proud advocate for equality. Also because my mother grew up in Squirrel Hill, Pittsburgh, PA. It really hit home for me, hearing my grandmothers’ distraught voice, slowly explaining the events that happened just a few moments before in her old home.
The shooting in Tree of Life synagogue had been marked as the largest anti-Semitic hate crime in American History. With eleven dead and several more seriously injured it definitely earned the hellish title. It will forever have a huge impact on our country, and the lives of Jews.
On Tuesdays, I have Hebrew school where we talk about our problems and vent about the newest political scandal. Saying exactly how we feel in a safe setting. Sort of like Daily Kos but more private. I love it, it’s almost therapeutic and definitely something to look forward to the beginning of the week.
This week though, tensions were high. All of us in shock barely able to comprehend the horrific massacre that had occurred only three days prior. Changing the lives of everyone in America. We sat there in silence after watching a news interview with the rabbi of Tree of Life synagogue. Then my teacher and rabbi spoke. His words seemed to cut through the air like a knife. What he said though, sent shockwaves down my spine.
“We will now be practicing lockdowns. We have trimmed the trees and shrubs around the grounds so we can see outside easier. We have emergency alert buttons that we can press to alert the local police department, we have found these are more effective than a cell phone.”
I just about lost my shit. Pardon my French. If you have read some of my past diaries you probably already know how I feel about lockdown drills and how they affect me and other students. In the past, I have made it clear how much I despise them. But now I realize that they are necessary.
The heartbreaking thing is, is that preschoolers are going to be growing up with these, in constant, painful fear for their lives solely because they are Jewish. They may be too young now to completely understand what is happening because even I can admit, I didn’t realize the severity of what happened until my rabbi said: “this is the biggest anti-Semitic hate crime in the history of America.” Only then did I come to the terrifying realization. We are all at risk. Especially right now, with the world at each other's throats, constantly filled with hate, anger, and resentment. Terror on the streets, schools, places of worship, and even homes.
How someone can mercilessly slaughter a 97-year-old woman with no regret is not fathomable, and truly something I hope to never be able to understand. How someone can be so blinded by hate and fear that they are able to murder innocent people is beyond me. How someone can be so ruthless?
They are my people. Now we all have to come together as one. As I have said before:
“I know some people don't believe in or don't have hope for things. And sometimes it seems hope itself doesn't accomplish anything. But if you use that hope as fuel and persevere and most importantly believe in yourself you can accomplish much. Hope is important. Hope is something you need to use for everyday life. Sometimes hope doesn't seem like enough, but it is.”
Sometimes only hope doesn’t seem like enough. And it might not be. But it’s sure as hell a good start. Because right now my god damn people, my blood, ancestors, family, including the millions of Jews I have never met, are in trouble. And we as a nation MUST come together. Not only for Jews but Muslims, Mexicans, African Americans etc. Everyone. Everyone is a human being.
Now, my synagogue is under constant surveillance by the police department. Every day we are forced to wonder if we are next. What could be a usual morning Shabbat service could end in death. A loss of family. That was lost on Saturday. I lost family, though we are not related by blood and I never met any of the victims, they were family. We all share a history filled with hardship and perseverance. That unites us as a family, as a people.
Now, let me ask you one thing. Did you learn the “golden rule” in elementary school? “Treat others how you want to be treated.” I think we may need to send these right-wing politicians and racists back to elementary school... maybe they can learn how to spell correctly. Morans... No, really I think Trump and Robert Bowers could really use another year of fourth grade. (Maybe then Trump can go to eighth grade and learn the constitution because that’s kind of important to know when you’re the supposed POTUS.)
Anyways... now that we’ve established that we will be commencing lockdown drills and our president doesn’t understand the severity of the situation at hand. Nor does he know how to properly address it, since he simply blamed the victims and then moved on. Fabulous.
I wish I was able to think of positive things to say, beneficial occurrences in our country last week but all that seemed to happen is catastrophe. But I have nothing good to say, nothing good came out of this. Sure, you can grasp at straws and say it brought people together, but in reality in amplified the fragmentation that is particularly prominent in our country at the moment.
Much love to, not only the victims and survivors but all minorities as well. Just remember, hope is real, follow the light and never allow it to fade, only allow it to become brighter, illuminate love and blind hate.