When Rudy Giuliani joined President @realDonaldTrump's all-star legal defense team back in mid-April, he hoped to bring a quick end to the Mueller investigation—perhaps a week or two.
Fast forward to the present day, nearly four months later, and the investigation shows no signs of ending anytime soon.
In fact, a good argument could be made that Giuliani's presence has contributed to its longevity.
Between his contradictory statements, "alternative facts," and unreasonable demands, Giuliani has all but ensured that the investigation will hang over the midterm elections.
According to numerous press reports, Trump is eager to talk to Mueller—believing that he can convince him this is all a "witch hunt."
But Giuliani knows that if Trump tells the truth (unlikely), he'll be guilty of obstruction, and if he lies (likely), he'll be guilty of perjury.
Morning lineup:
Meet the Press: Lowlife Omarosa Manigault Newman; Roundtable: David Brooks (New York Times), Former Rep. Donna Edwards (D-MD), Former North Carolina Gov. Pat McCrory (R) & Kristen Welker (NBC News).
Face The Nation: Sen. Tim Kaine (D-VA); Sen. Tim Scott (R-SC); Mayor of Charlottesville, VA Nikuyah Walker (I); Roundtable: Historian Jon Meacham, Activist DeRay Mckesson, Former Extremist Christian Picciolini & Jamelle Bouie (Slate).
This Week: Counselor to the President Kellyanne Conway; Rep. Elijah Cummings (D-MD); Rudy Giuliani (9/11); Attorney Michael Avenatti; Roundtable: Republican Strategist Ana Navarro, Former DNC Chair Donna Brazile, Former Trump White House Legislative Affairs Director Marc Short & Jonathan Swan (Axios).
Fox News Sunday: Counselor to the President Kellyanne Conway; Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-SC); Roundtable: Charlie Hurt (Washington Times), Former Press Secretary to VP Pence Marc Lotter, Lisa Lerer (Associated Press) & Juan Williams (Fox News).
State of the Union: Rudy Giuliani (9/11); Former Virginia Gov. Terry McAuliffe (D); Roundtable: Republican Operative Michael Caputo, Nina TurneR (Our Revolution), Republican Strategist Amanda Carpenter & Former South Carolina State Rep. Bakari Sellers (D).
Evening lineup:
60 Minutes will feature: a report on Russia's hacking of the 2016 election (preview); a report on the legacy of lynching (preview); and, a report on the progression of Alzheimer's over 10 years (preview).
Late night shows:
The Late Show with Stephen Colbert
Monday: Rapper Nicki Minaj; Actor Guy Pearce; Rapper Mac Miller.
Tuesday: Actor Mark Wahlberg; Sen. Bernie Sanders (I-VT).
Wednesday: Actress Jessica Biel; Comedian W. Kamau Bell; Singer-Songwriter Elle King.
Thursday: Tommy Vietor, Jon Favreau & Jon Lovett (Crooked Media); Actress Constance Wu; Rapper Jay Rock.
Friday: Rerun.
The Daily Show with Trevor Noah
Monday: Director Spike Lee; Tuesday: Lowlife Omarosa Manigault Newman; Wednesday: Actor Jimmy O. Yang; Thursday: Comedian D.L. Hughley.
Elsewhere...
"Sheriff" Joe Arpaio expressed some regrets about his interview with Sacha Baron Cohen.
Former Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio admits that he made a "bad mistake" by allowing himself to be interviewed by Sacha Baron Cohen as part of an undercover television show.
Arpaio says he got particularly confused when Cohen began discussing various "jobs," President Trump, and golden showers.
"So he's talking and I couldn’t understand him. He's talking about golden showers. I thought he was talking about — the president has gold [in his shower]."
"And then handjob," Arpaio continued. "What was that? He was talking about illegals coming over working with their hands on their job."
"Then the other thing — the only thing I got was that he would offer me a job. I didn’t hear that little thing before that," Arpaio said, referring Cohen's asking him if he would take a blowjob from the president. "I don’t know where that came from."
During the initial interview, Arpaio appeared to tell Cohen that he would accept a "blowjob" from the president. He also said that "it wouldn't surprise me" if Trump had a golden shower.
Meanwhile...
Texas Gov. Greg Abbott had no regrets about tweeting a fake Churchill quote.
On Tuesday morning, Texas Gov. Greg Abbott tweeted a meme that falsely attributed a quote about fascism to former Prime Minister Winston Churchill. The quote states, "The fascists of the future will call themselves anti-fascists."
Abbott tweeted the meme at 1:10 a.m. Tuesday, adding "some insights are timeless." He deleted it at around 10:20 a.m, after it had been retweeted more than 1,400 times. More than 2,600 people responded, many of whom pointed out that the quote was not Churchill's.
The governor's spokesmen did not respond to requests for comment before it was deleted. Abbott was then asked about the tweet at a press conference early Tuesday afternoon.
"What I tweeted was a sentiment that I had," Abbott said at a news conference on changes to the state's bail laws. "It was irrelevant to me who may or may not have said that in the past. I didn't want to be accused of plagiarism for saying it. If no one else said it, attribute the quote to me because it's what I believe in."
And, in related news...
Don Jr. shared some photoshopped job approval numbers on Instagram.
Donald Trump, Jr., on Friday shared a doctored image of a CNN graphic that inaccurately stated that his father had a 50 percent approval rating in a Gallup poll.
The graphic, which Trump Jr. posted on Instagram on Thursday, appears to come from a Monday segment on CNN during which host John King fact checked the president's previous tweet claiming that Trump has "better numbers than Obama at this point, by far."
The original graphic shows Trump with a 40 percent approval rating, compared to former President Obama's 45 percent approval rating from the same point of his presidency. However, the one shared by Trump, Jr., is doctored to show a 50 percent approval rating.
"Amazing. I guess there is a magic wand to make things happen and @realdonaldtrump seems to have it," Trump Jr. wrote in the Instagram post.
Trump has never received a 50 percent job approval rating in the Gallup weekly tracker of the measurement.
May the Space Force be with you.
– Trix