It is Sunday, Aug. 26, and as you are reading this I have moved on to the next stage of my life. I moved my son into the dorms at the University of Wisconsin-Madison. I am now an empty nester. I knew this day would come, but I never expected it to feel so soon.
I have had several co-workers come up to me during the past week, asking about my son going off to college. They then regale me with the stories of their college days, moving into the dorms, and away from home for the first time. I nod and smile, as I have zero frame of reference for their stories.
When they were going off to college I was in Army Basic Training, where every mistake I made was met with fire and fury. Any misstep or error was reason for punishment and all of us in the company were punished for one man’s slightest infraction. I forged a brotherhood during those 13 weeks at Ft. Leonard Wood with those who were there before me, with me, and came after me.
I often wonder what it would have been like to go off to college and live in the dorms. But I would not have changed my experience for anything in the world.
The four years my son spends in college will be far different than my four years in the Army. That being said, I can only offer him some advice as he starts his new journey.
- You will make mistakes: learn from them.
- Alcohol = liquid stupid.
- You will be meeting people of all different stripes. Treat everyone with dignity and respect.
- Study hard, but leave time for play.
- Take classes outside your major, be curious, and make yourself a well-rounded person.
- Make sure you do something you love, not just something to earn a living.
- Call or text your mom daily, even if it is just to say, “Hi mom.”
- Check in with me once in a while.
- Be humble.
- If you see someone in need, help them.
- Stand up for people who cannot stand up for themselves.
- Take a lot of pictures—not selfies, but real photos of you and your friends.
- Do not take advantage of anyone under the influence of alcohol.
- Take advantage of any opportunity to travel.
- Do not be afraid to talk to people different than you; they are just people.
- Always get consent.
- If you utter the words, “Here, hold my beer and watch this,” you are responsible for the consequences.
- If an opportunity presents itself, take it. Even if it is outside your comfort zone.
- Never get a credit card.
- Start saving for retirement as soon as you can (after college).
- Life will throw you curveballs. When it happens, do not panic, and work through it calmly.
- Put your phone down and just watch the world around you.
- Smile at everyone.
- Never stop playing guitar.
- Enjoy your time in college, you will only be this age once.
- Your guitar and your amps go up to eleven ...
That is not a tear in my eye, it is just some dust. It seems like yesterday you were sleeping on my chest, and now I am sending you off to college. I can only hope that even though I screwed up a lot while raising you, that I got the important stuff right.
Even though I went on after the Army to get a masters degree, I am still a grunt at heart. So I leave you with the motto of my beloved 54th Engineers: Essayons et Faisons—Let us try, let us do.
Try, and do Everett. Try and do.