The Daily Beast reported that Tucker Carlson used his Fox News microphone to attack MSNBC host Chris Hayes and New York Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. What were Tucker’s big boy burns?
“Chris Hayes is what every man would be if feminists ever achieved absolute power in this country: apologetic, bespectacled, and deeply, deeply concerned about global warming and the patriarchal systems that cause it,” Carlson said of the All In host.
Tough stuff. Chris Hayes is super weak because he’s willing to admit that our patriarchal system has become so toxic that we are literally incinerating our planet into uninhabitability! What a loser! Amiright? He should be like Tucker Carlson who doesn’t have any issues with his masculinity! Strong like bowtie! Well, Tucky didn’t stop there.
Call the waaaaahmmmbulance
“So it’s official. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is a moron and nasty and more self-righteous than any televangelist who ever preached a sermon on cable access. She’s not impressive, she’s awful.”
I feel like Tucker is trying to tell us something. I just. Can’t. Put. My. Finger. On. It! Rep. Ocasio-Cortez, decided to check in on angry Tucker to make sure he was OK.
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Yes. He is so very mad, Rep. Ocasio-Cortez. When he was in his 20s, Tucker thought his rising star was going to make him the next William F. Buckley. Little did he realize that most of Buckley’s ideas aren’t considered very intelligent anymore, and Tucker never had the actual endurance to be an intellectual. Now, the guy who thought when he got enough power he would be respected suspects that no one ever will. Meanwhile, Rep. Ocasio-Cortez has nothing but respect from millions of Americans and she didn’t have to pretend to like bowties and act like a third rate Pat Buchanan to stay in front of television cameras.*
Don’t be mad, Tucker.
*Pat Buchanan by the time he was hosting Crossfire was already a second rate Pat Buchanan.