Putting myself on the Community Needs List was hard for me as I always have trouble asking for help and I only consider this legitimate due to the encouragement of others. Like anyone, I would rather earn as a rule. BTW if you’re wondering why I haven’t done a lot of diaries in May: regularly-paid gigs increased, though not enough to get me out of the woods financially.
The time-sensitive need: my 21-year-old autistic son Raphael and I live out in the country where it's necessary to own a car. My Chevy Cobalt, which has close to 400,000 kilometres (about 250,000 miles) on it was pronounced dead, i.e. too expensive to fix to be worth fixing by my (excellent) mechanic recently. He also says it’s unsafe to drive due to rust and wear on brakes, suspension, exhaust, etc. (Previous owner commuted something like 150 miles every weekday and apparently never rustproofed.)
This means I have to get another car asap. (As a note of pride, it's not just for me but for Raphi, who despite his autism earned his learner's permit on May 2 and is driving despite a lot of people, including me, having had doubts he could :-) )
So why am I financially strapped in the first place? Basically because I am a creative person who was taught very early in life that, even though I was talented, what I produced was worse than worthless, actually bad and crazy, and therefore I was worse than worthless as a person. It’s a long story, but let’s just say that what my mother did to me when I was a preschooler made my father sexually abusing me all through my teens look like a picnic. (I sued him successfully in the 90s, reconciled, got over it.) I’ve also had only dysfunctional partners, more drains than contributors.
I'm succeeding in healing the creativity-related trauma, so I've become able to do things like, say, ask for donations for my diaries here, starting a year and a half ago. But catching up financially is taking a lot of time, and lenders don’t like how much debt I still have. I've been turned down for a couple of car loans.
I am hoping to raise about $1,900, which wouldn't buy me an entire car, but as a downpayment would put me in a much better position to negotiate financing.
Thanks for reading my funding drive (rimshot).
You can use my usual link to donate — please choose “send money” rather than “pay” if you can — by clicking here.