DAD REMEMBRANCE DAYS
This post is part of a series of stories about my Dad I am posing in what I call “Dad Remembrance Days” which is annually the days between his Birthday on April 26 to his Deathday on May 4 and his Funeralday on May 8. I will be posting stories and pictures, perhaps every day or not depending on my time and energy, about our time together and his life. If you have any questions or want me to address specific topics, please let me know in the comments.
Thank ye,
#jtg
Dad’s final decline began a few days before he died.
Over the years, beginning with his months-long coma in 2000, Dad had several times been declared hopeless by his medical caretakers. I had made arrangements several times over the years for Dad’s funeral, and yet he had pulled out of his declines and recovered. I had reason to believe that Dad was about to pull another Lazarus recovery this time as well. Dad had been in and out of hospitals and nursing homes for months and I had thought he might die several times, but he had been in a steady uptick again and seemed like he might yet again pull out. He was eating well and he was able to walk up and down the hallways again, which had been a sign of his recovery in the past.
Dad had been in a nursing home called “The Ridge” for awhile. I had been visiting him every day for many hours each day. I would take my laptop and/or tablet and we would watch movies on Netflix together. However, The Ridge had become a terrible place. In 2007 when Dad was thereafter his lung cancer surgery, it was a very good place, but in the years between 2007 and 2015 it had declined in almost every way ranging from food to competence of care, so I had him switched to a place called “Windsor Gardens”, which was MUCH better. In the new place, Dad was doing well.
Side note: The Ridge is now a focus of the COVID19 outbreak.
Dad celebrated his 88th birthday on April 26, 2015, while in the Ridge. It really was not much of a celebration with just me visiting as part of my daily multi-hour visit.
Over the next few days, I continued to visit, and encourage Dad to get up and walk up and down the hallways as I had done every time he’d been in the hospital for the past 15 years I’d been his caregiver.
On April 29, the Windsor Gardens had a party for everyone who had an April birthday. I got Dad up and had him taken to the party where he had a slice of cake and got sang to. Dad was alert and seemed well on his way to another recovery.
However, this recovery was not looking as good as his previous recoveries. This time it appeared he might not be able to walk very well and might be bedridden. This might have meant an extended stay in rehab, or if Dad did come home, the house might need some extensive refurbishment. I suggested to Dad that we might need to knock out a wall between the living room and the front bedroom for better access. Dad at first said NO to that idea citing costs, but I pointed out that might be the only way he might be able to return home again. However, that was to be.
I got a call late that night telling me that Dad had been sent from the rehab to the hospital. I did not know it at the time, but Dad’s final decline had begun, and he died several days later on May 4, 2015.
I will take more about Dad’s final days tomorrow.
#jtg