Sticks and Stones: Satire
By Lyer, Fibski & Propagandovitch, famous Moscow PR outlet
For immediate release:
A senior official at the RNC Headquarters in Washington, DC has confirmed that the GOP is splitting up into Sticks and Stones factions.
The Stones group thinks the Sticks are too weak. “Everyone knows that Stones are stronger than Sticks”, a spokesman of the Stoners said. “We will fight anyone who opposes us. Our dear leader appreciates it”.
There is still some hope for accommodation, however. “We aspire to be a big tent”, the RNC official said. “Bringing together both the Sticks and Stones contingents is our primary focus. It is our hope that they will be able to work out their disagreements. You know, there are good people on both sides”.
“At least they’re not Word people”, he said with a sneer. “You can see how far that got the prosecution in the recent impeachment trial.”