Convenient Lies: Satire
By Lyer, Fibski & Propagandovitch, famous Moscow PR outlet
For immediate release:
In 2006, Al Gore, the former VP under President Clinton, who actually did have his 2000 presidential election stolen, published a book about climate warming, called An Inconvenient Truth. Little did he know that a scant 15 years later, the Republican Party would wallow almost exclusively in convenient lies.
We asked a senior official at the Republican National Committee why the GOP now lies consistently. “The American people don’t like bad news and neither do we”, he said. “The last POTUS, who is still our POTUS, showed us the way. He lied over 30,000 times and it made him powerful and respected. Like, totally.”
“Most recently”, he added, “the Great Prevaricator formulated a Big Lie that he had the November 2020 election stolen from him and that he was still the POTUS. It took him many months to do it during a fake pandemic, but our base ate that up. Why do we want to give the libs any rewards? A make-believe universe can keep us feeling good. At worst, we’ll be perpetual victims with un-satisfiable grievances. A win-win, in our opinion.”
“The truth is only for Democrats”, he continued. “We expel any dirty truth-tellers from our party. We’re uncompromising.”
“And as George Orwell famously wrote in his book, 1984: ‘The party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.’ Who can argue with that?”, he concluded.