I live in a very remote area 75 miles north of Los Angeles in the Los Padres National Forest. I find that many of the few here have somehow been brainwashed that covid is of no consequence to them as it only affects flatlanders, the elderly and certain ethnic groups and through misinformation many have no intention of being vaccinated or wearing masks as it would demean their “exceptionality”. For the last 12 months I have attempted to convince them otherwise, calmly or sometimes vehemently, in vain and was about to give up trying. Until three days ago…
When I moved here five years ago my nearest neighbor was an 83-year-old woman. She was scheduled for heart valve surgery in February 2020. It was cancelled because of covid. One week before Thanksgiving 2020, she tripped on the cart holding her oxygen tank that was keeping her alive and fractured her hip. She remained hospitalized until she passed away last January because of heart failure. During hospitalization she had been allowed only one in-person visit by her family before she died from a broken heart, literally and figuratively.
Her family put her home up for sale and two weeks ago I watched from my deck as a group convened nightly to unload furniture and appliances. I ventured over a couple of nights later and introduced myself to the new owner. She was a sun and wind worn woman in her 50’s named Melinda. She told me she owned a horse ranch 10 miles west and had bought the house for her 83-year-old mother who had dementia. She had hired a 20 something young lady to be a live-in caregiver for her mother. She explained to me that caring for her mother and tending to her horses and other animals by herself had become too overwhelming.
The spirit, determination and the bright sparkle in her eyes reminded me of the rare “special” people I had met in my life and was the stuff that most commonly one only reads about in novels.
Three days ago, I got a text from Melinda that her 20 something care giver had left her mother alone and had informed Melinda she wasn’t going back. Apparently, the young lady wasn’t mentally capable of caring for someone who could only communicate through written notes that were beyond the reality of the moment and having to change her Depends.
I went over to her house and found the mother sitting in a wheelchair staring out the front screen door alone.
Her first note to me was that Toby would die if Melinda didn’t come. After a couple of minutes, I surmised Toby was the dog sitting by the fireplace and the mother was projecting her plight on the dog. I made her a sandwich and gave her a bottle of water which calmed her down and her written conversation became more coherent.
I had assumed Melinda was tending to her horses and called her. She answered in a scratchy voice that was hard to understand. After three attempts she finally conveyed to me she was 40 miles away at THE hospital and had just tested positive for covid.
It was one of those few times in my life that I was in a situation, that regardless of my own self-interest, I felt compelled to help resolve something I knew nothing about for someone I hardly knew because there was no one else to do so.
Melinda arrived about an hour later, red faced, gasping between words, and stayed in her car with the seatback in the prone position. Soon after, a friend of hers, Cass, showed up. She was a woman about the same age as Melinda. After Melinda saw her mother was safe with the two of us, she went home because her horses needed food and water.
After Melinda left, Cass convinced me the immediate solution would be for her to take the mother to the ranch. There, the mother would be in an environment she recognized and was comfortable with. Cass and the mother could sleep in the barn since the house could be full of covid, and Cass could tend to the horses in the morning as well as look after Melinda.
We packed the mother and her wheelchair into Cass’s SUV. Somewhat relieved, I retreated to my house, stirred but not shaken, but could not rest knowing the situation was not resolved.
I remembered at Christmas it had snowed four straight days and our small market had emptied its shelves early in the storm and I hadn’t much food. A neighbor had informed me that Mountain Community Services, a non-denominational organization, was giving out boxes of food about a mile from me of which I was a grateful recipient.
I called them and explained the situation. They were very patient and let me ramble on and explain a situation that I was only then beginning to fully understand as I spoke of it to them.
The next day they arranged to have the mother taken back to the house next door with 24-hour professional supervision until she could be placed in a nursing home.
Melinda was transported by ambulance yesterday, thanks to Mountain Community Services,40 miles back to the hospital. Today Melinda is on a ventilator. I know she will survive, because I so much want her to, and I know so does she, because she has horses to tend to… and…
I hope to ride them together with her one day...
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