She was never really mine. She was always her own self. Still, she was also my partner, my companion, my lover, my spouse, my steadfast coparent and my unbreakable support. We met in February, 1968, and were together permanently, more or less, by April, 1968. We married in December, 1970 and so remained until January 7, just past, when suddenly and unexpectedly, death did us part. True, she had been hospitalized for a mild stroke suffered the day after Christmas, but her medical team emphasized the limited extent of the damage and she visibly improved after she transferred to the rehab hospital for therapy. But her daughters and I lost her in the dark, small hours before dawn on 1/7, as a disembodied nurse’s speakerphone voice spoke the cold, dire words of her passing.
Which, oddly, brings us to the subject of dogs. During our marriage, we were pure bred dog fanciers for many years, largely owing to my own misspent youth among elite dog show people and breeders. But, later, we and our daughters came to appreciate the virtue of stray rescue, our rescued pets now currently numbering six in three households, more if we count the children. Our rescue, Phoebe, pictured, right, as a 10 month old pup, remains my most enduring and comforting non-human companion in this challenging time of my life.
Rescue-minded friends who loved and admired my late spouse established an on-line donation link in her honor to support AJK Family Rescue, an Austin, Texas adoption service saving dogs from area kill shelters, including my much loved grand-dog, Dolly.
These dear friends asked that I post the donation link on my blog. I hesitated for several days, mulling over the fact that in more than a decade of blogging at Daily Kos, I never disclosed her personal identification. But, I am going to do it now.
After we married, and throughout her long legal career as a Federal bank regulator, Brenda took my surname. She posted at Daily Kos as Expat Okie.
To make a tribute supporting stray rescue in Brenda Franks’ honor, please click on this link.
Thank you.