Dad was the subject of a number of my blogs. In one of my favorites, he spent pretty much an entire day on the phone w/ me answering questions about his childhood and early adult years with my mother, and then connecting his memories to what was happening in the country. Then we would talk about his experiences in the context of the greater cultural and political events occurring at that time. He always had a lot to say about what was happening in the country - and the world. I loved those conversations with him, because I had him all to my self. That’s the thing about my dad - if you told him you needed something, whether a recipe or you have a dream, he gave you his full attention. He was present, and he helped you achieve your dream.
It was during one of these phone conversations that he talked about some changes that were occurring with his memory, speech patterns and fine motor movement. He had gone to his neurologist, but nothing had come of it just yet. Of course, there was no way any of us could have known that this was the start of our father’s final journey.
During one of the interviews at UCSF, they asked my dad what his greatest strength is. He thought about this for a few moments, then said, “perseverance.” I have often thought about his response. To persevere means that we continue to move forward no matter what obstacles may be in the way. A terminal illness was in my father’s way. But he persevered - he literally did everything his medical team directed him to do. He did it because he did not want to ever leave his family.
I’ve heard it said to watch out for the quiet people - they are the ones who will surprise you because you don’t ‘hear’ them coming… such was his sense of humor.
My father did not lose a battle to this illness - he faced it with grace and dignity. 02/05/1937 — 12/30/2021