The Association of Public Health Laboratories fired me for bringing a bicycle into a national meeting at a convention center. Among other stupid things they also did were hiding from conversations and having their contractor blindside me with the news at 4 pm on a Friday afternoon.
Incompetence at APHL is plainly evident by reviewing the state of the web site they run to host American newborn screening data at newsteps.org, as well as, to employees such as me who receive contracts with nonsense dates, incorrect power supplies for their computers, and three sets of web server configurations in as many months.
Given their many failures, it was no surprise to me that they sent a box to return my computer to the wrong address. They even had their contractor call me to get the correct address, and I told them the correct address, but they still sent a box to the wrong address. A week later they finally sent a box to the correct address, which I received soon thereafter, as I also picked up the box they sent to the wrong address.
In short, APHL presented me with a quandary and opportunity. Should I recycle the second box and discard the shipping label they provided? After returning their computer within a few days of having a box in hand, I was later able to find the incorrect power supply they provided, and I did have a stack of magnets from their meeting that they would have thrown in the garbage if I had not saved them. So, I had more of their property to return and a second box to ship with. Might as well return their property and send a couple of gifts too.
And, that is what I did. I returned their property, along with a few other items, including fine chocolate from Kitchen Conservatory in Clayton, MO, some campaign literature for them to recycle, and a couple of lead weights for scuba divers in the organization. The lead weights also symbolized the intent of their stupidity and callousness on my career, though their lead-like density may prevent such comprehension.
In order to minimize concerns about the chocolate, I recorded the entire purchase, and delivery to the door of FedEx. Employees of FedEx informed me that video recording was prohibited inside, so I stopped recording only as I was entering their storefront.
I hope somebody at APHL enjoys the chocolate, but I gave it to them to use as they wish.
Here is the recording posted on Youtube.